You.

Monday Mumbles

The 100 Greatest Female Artists of Rock'n'Roll has been published.

How is Celine Dion there and not Nina Simone? I mean really, how is Nina Simone *not* on there? It's obscene!

Still on music, it's surprising just what can be created using only sounds from Windows XP and Windows 98.

If you're running short of toilet paper, why not try the 100% recycled Shit Be Gone! That is seriously its name. I do like it when you know where you are with a product, and exactly what it will do!

I'm sure I'm not the only one whose teenage years were characterised by Judy Blume and all her books and characters. Interesting to see, then, that two of her books have been updated to reflect more recent practise in sexual health. And one of them's Forever, which was the one we all thought was exceedingly rude. Ah, the innocence!

New Photo Blog Updates

The Orton Effect

Photo to Drawing: Raspberries

Spell With Flickr

More Orton Effect

Fake Model Photography

Same Photo, Different Treatments

Duel / Dangerous Pathways.

I don't know if you've ever seen the film Duel, but despite it having virtually no dialogue, not much of a plot, and a tiny budget, it is one of the scariest films you could ever see.

This, my friends, is just the same.

Sic!

From worldwidewords

Sic!
-------------------------------------------------------------------
"Don't most people know this already?" was Tom Gould's comment on a
front-page teaser headline advertising an article inside (what's
the newspaper term for these?) that appeared in The Tennessean on
26 March: "Don't expect smart car dealer soon."

What a difference a misplaced hyphen makes. Annie Clarke reports
that the London freesheet Metro included a headline on 27 March:
ANTI-YOUTH CRIME EVENT.

"The instructions on a carpet cleaner," e-mailed Pete Swindells,
"caused me momentary confusion: 'Empty when full'."

Department of athletic horticulture. Henry Drury was reading the
Home & Living section of the Sunday Telegraph for 30th March and
found this property advert: "Paradise Cottage, West Berkshire, a
glorious Grade II listed four bedroom hotchpotch of a cottage.
Gardens and a stream run through the property."

Bankers struggle against their reputation for unfeeling arrogance
but error messages like the one that Roger Jones encountered on the
Barclays Bank Web site don't help: "We suggest you try to log in
later and apologise for any inconvenience this may cause."

Not really ok

It's a year today since Helen died.

Well, probably. The inquest couldn't give an exact date, they gave a week's time span, but from the evidence given I do think it was the 3rd.

I miss her every day. Every day. But today feels even worse. I feel weighed down with sadness.

incurable hippie is 'a convergence of the worst aaspects (sic) of the religious right and feminism'

I am, apparently, a tool of the religious right. And the brave 'Anonymous' tells *me* to get a grip!

In other, less surprising, news:

Homophobia rife in British society, landmark equality survey finds.

· Bullying in schools worse than for older generations
· Public bodies complacent, says gay rights charity

Britain's 3.6 million lesbian, gay and bisexual people see themselves confronted by huge barriers of prejudice at every level of society, according to the first authoritative poll of their views.

The poll, commissioned by the equality charity Stonewall, which said some public bodies were too "smug" about their record on discrimination, indicates that the schoolyard is the most entrenched bastion of prejudice.

The YouGov poll of 1,658 gay adults found homophobic bullying in schools is more prevalent now than in previous decades. Around 30% of lesbian and gay people expect to encounter discrimination if they were to try to enrol a child at primary or secondary school, and 80% believe they would have difficulty if they were to apply to become a school governor.

The NHS, police and courts are doing better than the education system in combating discrimination. However, a significant minority of gay people expect to be treated less well at a GP surgery or during an emergency admission to hospital.

One in four think they will be treated less fairly by police if they become a victim of hate crime, while one in five expect to find it harder than a heterosexual person to get social housing, and nine in 10 expect barriers to becoming a foster parent.

The poll also suggested prejudice is endemic in political life, with most lesbian and gay people expecting discrimination if they seek selection by a party to run for parliament. Nearly nine in 10 think they would face such barriers from the Conservative party, 61% from the Labour party and 47% from the Liberal Democrats.

Ben Summerskill, the charity's chief executive, said: "Too many public services are a bit too smug about the progress made towards fair treatment for the lesbian and gay taxpayers who help fund them.

"Last spring we heard from a 14-year-old girl who had - incautiously - shared with a teacher at a faith school the thought that she might be gay. Subsequently the girl has been required to sit outside the changing room at the beginning and end of sports lessons while the 'normal' children get changed."

Of those polled, two-thirds of lesbian and gay people under 19 said they were bullied at school on grounds of sexuality, compared with half of those aged 35-44 and only a quarter of those over 55.

Stonewall said the problem was exacerbated in schools when teachers were banned by Section 28 of the 1988 Local Government Act from doing anything that could be perceived as promoting homosexuality. Section 28 was repealed in 2003, but the charity says the education system is years behind in its efforts to tackle prejudice.

Across Britain, one in 14 lesbian and gay people expect to be treated less well than heterosexuals when accessing healthcare. Gay women are almost twice as likely to expect discrimination on grounds of sexual orientation.

There are big regional differences in perceptions of discrimination in the NHS. In Wales, 16% thought they would get inferior treatment if they were admitted to hospital in an emergency, compared with 2% in the south-west.

Summerskill said: "The research highlights the one remaining gap at the heart of Britain's legislative equality framework. There is not yet a duty on public bodies requiring them to promote equality of service for gay people in a way that already exists for gender, ethnicity and disability. We'll now be pressing the government to honour its outstanding manifesto pledge to introduce such a duty."

Summerskill said he regarded the debate about the size of Britain's lesbian and gay population as having been settled by the Treasury's actuary department, which said it was 6%, or 3.6 million people.

Sell-Out.

It's that time of year again... the one where for an hour a week I turn into a raving capitalist.

The Apprentice. I just can't help myself! I guess I'm fired.

'I was seen as an object, not a person'

"I was seen as an object, not a person" | Lifeandstyle | Life and Health

Lap-dancing clubs are advertised as exclusive, glamorous entertainment for 'gentlemen'. As a former dancer tells Rachel Bell, the reality for the women who work in them is both degrading and dangerous

Wednesday March 19, 2008
The Guardian

Lap-dancing clubs
'Just by being there you're acknowledging that you are something the men can pick and choose from.'

Weeks after moving into a new flat, Elena [not her real name] learned that her temping contract was to be cut short - she had to find money to cover the rent as quickly as possible. She had recently met a woman who worked as a lap-dancer, which had reassured her that it "wasn't too dangerous. It made it seem normal." For the next six months, Elena worked for one of the many lap-dancing chains that assures customers that they are "gentlemen", paying for an "exclusive" experience. During that period, any sense that she had had of lap-dancing as just another job was laid firmly to rest.


It wasn't only the earning potential that led Elena to try lap-dancing - she now believes that she, and women in general, are socialised to see it as an inviting occupation. "I thought, well, I'm a sex object anyway, I might as well have it out on the table. It was as though I felt I couldn't do anything else. Everywhere I look I'm being told that my main source of power is my sexual power, my body is the best thing I have to offer and so to use those things in your job is empowering. But sexual power isn't power. It's meaningless in the real world."

Lap-dancing reinforced all Elena's negative beliefs about herself and about men. "The men just see you as an object, not a person, and whether you are equally engaged in their desire is irrelevant. Increasingly, you learn to despise the men because of the way they perceive you. Lap-dancing is about creating a situation whereby the men feel they are doing you a favour - that's the way the game is set up, so all the power is with the customer." She believes that for men who visit lap-dancing clubs, enjoyment derives primarily from handing over the money, not from the dance itself.

Rather than being a lucrative job, in her experience, as soon as a woman starts working at one of the clubs, it costs her money. "You pay 'rent' to the club just to be there and if you can persuade someone to buy a dance, you get £20 - about 20% of which the club takes. Then there are the fines - £10 if you miss your turn to pole dance, if you're late, you're wearing the wrong shoes or you break the rules. There are so many ways to make money from you. You are constantly trying to make as much money as possible out of everybody, otherwise you are literally paying to be there.

"The club management take on more women than are needed in a night so it really becomes dog eat dog. Quite often I made nothing. There were a lot of nights when I would have taken money out and come home with less." The most Elena made in a night was £205. "I love talking to people, but to make any money you really have to act stupid, admire their tie, massage their ego for hours. I could never go to work as anything near myself and that becomes damaging."

The message that working in the sex industry is normal, exciting - sometimes even empowering - is a popular one in our culture. Over the past few years, lap-dancing clubs have proliferated, branding themselves as a respectable part of the leisure industry. At the end of last year, Larry Flynt, the founder of Hustler magazine, opened his first British lap-dancing club in Croydon; Manchester has its first student lap-dancing bar, the Ruby Lounge, and a former stripper has been shown giving a topless lap-dance on Big Brother. Music videos by mainstream artists including Britney Spears, Kylie Minogue, Robbie Williams and Justin Timberlake, have featured lap-dancing or pole dancing, while job centres advertise lap-dancing jobs alongside the more usual calls for human resources managers and chefs.

Yet academic research has linked lap-dancing to trafficking, prostitution and an increase in male sexual violence against both the women who work in the clubs and those who live and work in their vicinity. A recent conference in Ireland highlighted the use of lap-dance clubs by human traffickers as a tool for grooming women into prostitution; the clubs also normalise the idea of paying for sexual services. And a report by the Lilith Project, run by the charity Eaves Housing, which looked at lap-dancing in Camden Town, north London, found that in the three years before and after the opening of four large lap-dancing clubs in the area, incidents of rape in Camden rose by 50%, while sexual assault rose by 57%.

One factor in the proliferation of these clubs is the 2003 Licensing Act which introduced the one-size-fits-all premises licence, meaning that strip clubs are no longer required to get special permission for nudity. The campaign group, Object, which is launching its Lap-Dance Challenge on April 22, wants legislation changed to classify lap-dancing clubs as "sex encounter establishments" and recognise them as part of the sex industry, which would allow local authorities to regulate them as such. Following round-table meetings with supportive MPs and local authorities, it is working to put forward a bill in the Commons.

Sandrine Levêque, advocacy officer at Object, says: "Ten years ago, a handful of lap-dancing clubs operated in the UK. Today that figure is well over 300, according to industry sources. This has been facilitated by liberalisation of the law, which licenses them in the same way as pubs and cafes, and not for what they really are."

The Fawcett Society and the Lilith Project are also calling for tighter controls on lap-dance clubs. In its 2007 report, Inappropriate Behaviour: Adult Venues and Licensing in London, the Lilith Project showed how current licensing policy helps to foster the illusion that all women are sexually available, in a culture in which a rape is reported every 34 minutes, and 26% of people believe that an "inappropriately" dressed woman is "asking for it".

Elena supports the calls for a change in licensing legislation. "I live in a country with unbelievable levels of rape, where two women die every week because they are murdered by their partners ... For me, I suppose, the question is always, why would you want somebody to take their clothes off for you when you know that they don't really fancy you, when you know it isn't what they really want to do?"

The sex industry doesn't just tell lies about women. One of its biggest lies is that it is positive for men. Statistics show that addiction to the porn and sex industries is the third biggest cause of debt in the UK, while sex and relationship therapists are seeing an increase in the number of men suffering from sex addiction. Does Elena think lap-dancing is damaging to men too? "Stag do's, in particular, made me think there must be a lot of crossed wires about it," she says. "I think men are fed just as much bullshit about their sexual identity as women are ... I don't think that it makes anybody happier".

One body of research on strip clubs in the US found that all dancers had suffered verbal harassment and physical and sexual abuse while at work; all had been propositioned for prostitution; and three-quarters had been stalked by men associated with the club.

Was Elena ever verbally abused, or propositioned for prostitution? "Just by being there," she says, "you're acknowledging that you are something that they can pick and choose from, in that dehumanising way. A lot of men are totally blunt, and will say 'I like bigger tits than you've got', or 'How much for a blowjob?' Sometimes men try to persuade you to go back to their houses or to a hotel room for sex. There's a lot of blurring of the understanding of what it is you're supposed to be doing and whether you're actually a prostitute.

"The clubs maintain a veneer of no touching, but touching is more standard than not," she continues. "If I had a boyfriend now and he said he was going to a lap-dancing club, I would consider it to be infidelity. The fact is that if you break the rules, you make more money. If one dancer starts breaking the rules then the pressure is on others to do the same. Otherwise a bloke would think, Well, that dancer charged me £20 and stayed three feet away, but that one charged me just the same and she put her breasts in my mouth and sat on my crotch. Once you've been there a while, you learn that certain things are profitable, and no contact is the first rule you learn to break. Eventually you start to wonder, what is the difference between me and a prostitute?"

Oddly, men who pay a naked woman for a sexual service in a lap-dancing club do not see themselves as "johns", she says. "It's seen as a totally respectable thing for a man to do. Yet I don't feel it's something I'd put on my CV. The respectability is very one-sided."

Elena doesn't believe that lap-dancing is about sex, instead, she says,"It fosters sexual violence. It is damaging even if people are doing it voluntarily. I chose it and that's part of the problem. Even if lap-dancers did make loads of money, it would be irrelevant - paying a lot for something doesn't make it all right. The point about lap-dancing clubs is to ask what they represent culturally and what they do to all of us, not just women working in them".

One reason that Elena stuck with the job was other people's perceptions of it. "The reality didn't matter as long as I could pretend [to myself] that other people thought it was interesting, glamorous or sexy. It's hard to say, 'I am shocked by the reality of it, I do feel degraded, but I need to pay the rent and gas bill'." Research shows that the majority of women become lap-dancers through poverty and lack of choice. "There was definitely a hope among the people who worked there that one day someone would come in who would just pay them loads of money and 'rescue' them," says Elena. "Cinderella thinking, if you like. There were single mothers, nurses - it wasn't what you might think. Some of these women had a whole other career but, for whatever reason, they needed to supplement their income. Some of the nurses would come in knackered after a day on A&E, strip till two in the morning and then go home."

Elena wishes to remain anonymous for self-protection. "The shadowy world behind some clubs is not something that you would want to go up against," she says. "You just know that instinctively." What finally made her leave? "I began to sort myself out a bit and realised that it was a crazy thing to do. I could never be myself. I just suddenly thought, Oh, there are loads of things I could do other than this. This is really shit. I'm going home."

Saturday Dribblings

Bad punctuation is everywhere, and I try not to be upset, but sometimes it is just unbearable!

This:

is a sign in Sheffield city centre. Caf'e. What happened?! I guess they were trying to convey the E acute accent on the E, but surely, if you really want to do that, and the signwriter doesn't have an E acute accent capability (?!) then you do CAFE'.

But if you think that's bad, I came across this in the Bon Marche magazine yesterday. It is entirely bewildering.



First to confirm, the product is not called TAKE. If it was, there could perhaps be some mitigating circumstances to the ad. But no.
'TAKE', control of your pelvic muscles.

Why? Why oh why oh why? Why is TAKE in capital letters? Why does it have quotation marks? And why is there a comma after it? Why?! Nothing in the world makes sense any more. Who wrote that ad? And who the hell approved it?! It's actually painful to my little mind.

---

New Photography blog updates.

Different Lomo Effect Tutorial
Create a Rainbow in Photoshop
More Classical Art Colour Match
Comparative Lomography!
Human Impact
Fresh

---

I watched this video on facebook, it was quite funny. It led me to look up the original on youtube, which was better (though without the sheer number of impressive celebs). However, it has left me singing to myself, "I'm fucking Matt Damon" all the time. Not a good one to be overheard singing, it gives entirely the wrong impression, i.e. that I'm fucking Matt Damon. And actually I'm not.

---

It is time to tell you about The PIPS. It's a Radio 4 blog, with a few of us on board. Radio Four has something of an obsessive following, of which I count myself a member. If you listen, or if you don't, check us out at The PIPS.

Say NO! to Hooters in Sheffield Petition : [ powered by iPetitions.com ]

Say NO! to Hooters in Sheffield Petition : [ powered by iPetitions.com ]

Spring Clean of Hippie blog

I have spent the last few hours spring cleaning. Not the house, though God knows it needs it. Nope, hippie blog.

The blog links are all up to date, and the numerous which no longer exist or which have moved or which require password access are moved down to the now huge 'Quiet Just Now' section on the right.

The bottom of the blog is also seriously trimmed. Out of date rings, links which lead to different places now than when I first added them, and unnecessaries were removed.

The 'Sites I Like' section hasn't yet been done, but you have to start somewhere.

BBC NEWS | Magazine | 'Robbed' of the right to smoke

Robbed of the right to smoke

The ban on smoking in enclosed public places has caused controversy, but what if you couldn't smoke in the place where you lived? It's what mental health patients are claiming.

Life in a typical mental health unit is not exactly festooned with luxuries. Like all hospitals, they can seem cold, clinical and austere places to many patients.

And life is about to get worse for many of those held in a unit. By 1 July 2008 they must all be smoke-free. Prisons, on the other hand, will remain exempt from the smoking ban.

The move is likely to anger many patients, who are not allowed to leave the unit and are not being punished for any crime. Already three are taking legal action over their right to smoke.


You have the choice to smoke in prison, but not in a mental hospital - but prisons are there for punishment, and hospitals are there for treatment
Rob Beech, legal advocate

Two of the cases, brought by Terrence Grimwood and another patient, are arguing against the early introduction of the ban at Rampton secure hospital by Nottinghamshire Healthcare NHS Trust in March 2007.

They say the ban infringes their human rights, namely article 8 of the European Convention on Human Rights, which guarantees respect for private and family life.

The third case, brought by a Rampton patient who can only be identified by their initials of WN, is against the secretary of state for health, for bringing the legislation through Parliament.

The patients argue the hospital is effectively their home and therefore they should be able to smoke. The new rules even prevent them smoking in the grounds.

Hospital is home

Smokers make up 26% of the general population, but 70% of mental health inpatients are smokers, according to Mental Health Today.

Mr Grimwood's solicitor, Marcus Brown, says it is a question of basic freedoms.

"They are being deprived of the choice of doing what they want," he says.

Legal advocate Rob Beech is representing the third Rampton patient to bring a legal challenge against the smoke-free policy.

"You have the choice to smoke in prison, but not in a mental hospital," he says. "But prisons are there for punishment, and hospitals are there for treatment."

One person who thinks the effects of the ban could be catastrophic is former patient, Judy Mead.

The 42-year-old, from Bristol, was sectioned twice - in 1985 as a 19-year-old and then again two years later. She spent several months as an inpatient and smoked about 15 cigarettes a day.

"I hadn't committed any crime when I was in a mental health unit and I was already angry at why I'd been sectioned, so being prevented from smoking would have made things worse.

Coping method

"What would have happened is that I would have been given more medication, because I already felt suicidal and having to give up smoking so suddenly would have made me more determined about taking my own life.

"For the first few weeks, my parents dissuaded my friends from visiting and as I didn't know any of the patients, the only friend I had was a cigarette."

A spokeswoman for Nottinghamshire Healthcare NHS Trust said the ban had been introduced across the whole of the organisation in March, and not just at Rampton.

Patients are all offered help with stopping smoking, she says.


MENTAL HEALTH AND SMOKING
40% of mental health service users smoke
70% of mental health inpatients smoke
50% of those using inpatient units classed as heavy smokers
Between 70% and 74% of people with schizophrenia smoke
56% of people with depression smoke

Emily Wooster, of mental health charity Mind, argues that asking people to stop smoking while they were mentally unstable could prove problematic for them.

"People who use mental health services are twice as likely to smoke as those who do not, and some may use this as a means of coping with distress," she says.

And there is even an argument that suddenly being made to give up smoking could worsen their problems, suggests Dr Chris Allen, a consultant clinical psychologist.

"If they're using smoking as a way of assistance to cope with their mental health problems, and then that's taken away, that could lead to problems being exacerbated."

A Department of Health spokesman insisted it was a question of mental health patients being entitled to a smoke-free environment, like other NHS users.

But whatever the arguments of those who want the smoking ban, many mental health patients will continue to think they are being singled out unfairly.

Below is a selection of your comments.

As a non-smoking community mental health nurse I have to agree with the in-patients comments. It is definitely not the best time to give up smoking when their mental state is unstable, and will-power is weaker than when mentally well. Ethically it's wrong to force vulnerable people, who may have no choice about being in hospital, to give up even though we know the health benefits of them doing so. The answer is to provide well ventilated separate smoking areas and probably a specialist support service to assist those individuals who choose to do something about their addiction.
David Barclay, Kirkcaldy, Scotland

This is typical of the way we are being forced to live by this government - the guilty are rewarded and the innocent are hounded for doing something perfectly legal. How arrogant of the Nottingham NHS spokesperson to blithely defend this blatant disregard of people's rights by saying they will be offered help to quit - what if they do not want to? Smoking is, as far as I am aware, still legal in this country and therefore every citizen should be given the right to exercise the freedom we are supposed to have - with the exception of people in prison, who are being punished for breaking an actual law and not just a knee-jerk health-freak one. It seems that the "human rights" of prisoners are far more important than those of the general population - the answer? Light up in a public place, get sent to prison and then puff away to your heart's content, safe in the knowledge that the government is too busy restricting the basic freedoms of the general population to realise that! You are doing as you please in the very situation which should restrict your freedom.
Paula, Ipswich, Suffolk

Whilst it would seem reasonable to create healthier environments for all, I believe that patients in mental hospitals are already under many pressures. My mother spent time on several occasions in mental hospitals and smoking was one of the ways which helped her to cope. I believe that by forcing patients to not smoke, could exacerbate their problems. It would be better to provide a separate smoking area and gradually help the smokers to weane off the cigarettes along with the other help being given for treatment.
Christopher Merriein, Chichester

It's ludicrously unjust to deny detained psychiatric inpatients the right to smoke while allowing prison inmates to do so.
Gavin Nash, Manchester, UK

Some mental health inpatients already feel, because of the state of their mind, that they are already being punished because, for various reasons, they have been admitted to hospital either voluntarily or sectioned. If their cigarettes are taken off them as well they are going to feel victimised even more. I do appreciate that non smokers are entitled to a smoke-free environment, but surely common sense should come into it as well. After all a ward is the only home a lot of mental health patients are going to know for a while. A wee corner should be found somewhere for smoking patients to be able to have a puff.
Andrea Brown, Ayr

Straw sacrifices prostitution law to ban strikes by prison staff | Politics | The Guardian

Straw sacrifices prostitution law to ban strikes by prison staff

The government last night dropped key parts of its criminal justice and immigration bill, including a crackdown on prostitution, to ensure that powers banning prison officers going on strike are rushed on to the statute book by May 8.

The justice secretary, Jack Straw, is also sacrificing a proposal which would have barred the appeal court quashing convictions on a technicality in cases where there was "no reasonable doubt" about the defendant's guilt. It stirred strong opposition in the legal world where it was seen as incursion on the discretion of judges.

The bill would have introduced a programme of "compulsory rehab" for those involved in prostitution and removed the pre-Victorian term of "common prostitute" from the statute book which ministers said was widely regarded as stigmatising and offensive.

Women who were persistently found to be involved in loitering and soliciting were to attend compulsory drug and alcohol rehabilitation courses instead of being fined. If they failed to attend at least three meetings of the course they could face up to 72 hours detention before being brought before a court.

Women's groups, penal reformers and probation officers said women would be locked up simply for missing meetings.

Ministers said the changes were a way of providing women with an "exit strategy" from the sex trade and were the only legislative proposals to emerge from a review of the laws surrounding prostitution carried out in 2003.

The term "common prostitute" dates back to the 1824 Vagrancy Act and a public consultation showed that it is now widely regarded as offensive.

The Ministry of Justice last night said it was withdrawing the prostitution and criminal appeal provisions of the bill to ensure the legislation received royal assent by May 8, when a voluntary no-strike agreement with the Prison Officers' Association will lapse 12 months after the union gave notice it wanted to end it.

A ministry spokesman said: "We are taking this action to ensure that legal protection is in place in the event of further industrial action destabilising the prison estate, as was witnessed on August 29 last year. We must take this action in order to meet our duty to protect the public."

A special delegates conference of the POA on February 19 gave the union executive a mandate to take action, including a strike, and a mandate not to sign a new no-strike agreement. Straw was prepared to sacrifice key parts of his criminal justice bill yesterday to ensure that there was no gap between the voluntary agreement lapsing and the introduction of the statutory ban on industrial action taking effect.

The bill was the 55th criminal justice bill since Labour came to power in 1997 and would have created 19 new criminal offences on top of the 3,000 created in the past decade.

Photography Blog Updates

World-Wide Moment

Jane Bown (Audio)

Burma Follow-up

Heeley City Farm

More from Heeley City Farm

Obsessed with the City Farm? Never!

Wind Turbines

English Tea-Can / China Painting Effect in Photoshop

Photo to Drawing - Photoshop

Further Photo to Drawing - Sunflowers

Classical Art Colour Match

The Lomo Effect

Buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo

Buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo is actually a complete and grammatically correct sentence.

Bison from Buffalo, New York who are intimidated by other bison in their community also happen to intimidate other bison in their community is a quick-ish translation, but if you're still confused, read the wikipedia page.

Love this stuff.

See also James while John had had had had had had had had had had had a better effect on the teacher.

Lost in Translation

Lost in Translation
is a fun site, looking at the difficulties of translating between languages, especially when done automatically by a computer. And especially when used by a (cunning) linguist.

You give it something in English, then it translates it to and from numerous languages then back into English, where the results are frequently comedic.

I asked it to translate, "I get knocked down then I get up again you ain't never gonna keep me down".

These are the results:
Translated to Japanese:
私はたたかれてそれから私を起こす再度でない決してgonna 固定しない私を得ない

Translated back to English:
As for me being hit, then it causes me, you do not obtain me whom for
the second time gonna which is not it does not lock under any
condition

Translated to Chinese:
至于我被击中, 它然后导致我, 您不获得我第二次去哪些不是它不锁定在任何情况下

Translated back to English:
Is hit as for me, does it then cause me, which you not to obtain me
second time to go to is not it does not lock in any situation

Translated to French:
Est frappé quant à moi, le fait me causent alors, au lequel vous
pour ne pas m'obtenir la deuxième fois d'aller n'est pas lui ne
verrouille dans aucune situation

Translated back to English:
Is struck as for me, the fact cause me then, with which you not to
obtain the second time to me to go is not him does not lock in any
situation

Translated to German:
Wird angeschlagen, was mich anbetrifft, die Tatsache verursachen mich
dann, mit dem, um zu gehen nicht zu mir das zweite mal zu erreichen
Sie, nicht er sperren nicht in irgendeine Situation sind

Translated back to English:
Fastened, which concerns me, the fact cause me then, with that, over
to go not to me second times to achieve you, not it do not lock into
any situation are

Translated to Italian:
Fissato, che lo interessa, il fatto mi induce allora, con quello,
l'eccedenza ad andare non a me seconde volte realizzarli, non esso non
blocca in tutta la situazione è

Translated back to English:
Fixed, than it interests it, the fact induces to me then, with that
one, the surplus to go to me second times not to realize them, it does
not block in all the situation is

Translated to Portuguese:
Fixo, do que ele interessa-o, o fato induz-me então, com esse, o
excesso para ir-me segundas épocas não os realizar, não obstrui em
toda a situação é

Translated back to English:
Fixture, of that it interests it, the fact induces me then, with this,
the excess to go me second times not to carry through them, does not
obstruct in all the situation is

Translated to Spanish:
La base, de ésa que lo interesa, el hecho entonces me induce a, con
esto, el exceso que vaya yo las segundas veces de no llevar a través
de ellos, no obstruye en toda la situación es

Translated back to English:
The base, of which it interests it, the then fact induces to me to,
with this, the excess that goes I them second times of not taking
through them, does not obstruct in all the situation is

So then I tried it with the description of me and this blog in the top right.

Original English Text: About me? Mad, in debt, feminist, radical, angry, pacifist, warrior, radio 4 listener, geek, flower-power chick... About Hippie blog? Ramblings, photos, fury, giggles and musings about love, peace, friendship, madness, happiness, the state of the world, my life, cool pics, my health and general ranting...

Translated to Japanese:
私についてか。、負債、男女同権主義者、怒っている、戦士で平和主義的な気違い、基、無線で送りなさい4 つ傾聴者、マニア、花力のひよこを... ヒッピーのblog についてか。世界の愛、平和、友情、狂気、幸福、状態、わめき散らす私の生命、涼しいpics 、私の健康および大将についての取留めのない会話、写真、激怒、くすくす笑いおよびmusings...

Translated back to English:
Concerning me? Debt, the man and woman same right principle person, it
is gotten angry, with the soldier the pacifism lunatic, send with the
basis and the radio 4 listening people, the maniac and the chick of
flower power... concerning blog of the hippie? My life which love,
peace, friendship and insanity of the world, happiness, state, screams
and scatters, cool pics, concerning my health and the leader
conversation, the photograph and the rage which do not have the taking
finishing blow, secretly laughing and musings...

Translated to Chinese:
关于我? 债务、人工和妇女同样合适的原则人员, 它被得到恼怒, 以战士和平主义疯子, 发送以基本类型和收音机4 听的人员、疯子和花力量小鸡... 关于嬉皮的blog? 爱的我的寿命, 和平、世界的友谊和疯狂, 幸福, 状态, 尖叫和没有采取的精整吹动, 秘密笑和musings... 的消散,
冷静pics, 关于我的健康和领导交谈、相片和愤怒

Translated back to English:
About me? The debt, the man-power and the woman similarly appropriate
principle personnel, it are obtained angry, by the soldier pacifism
lunatic, transmits by the basic type and the radio 4 tins of
personnel, the lunatic and the colored strength chicken... about plays
skin blog? Loves my life, peace, the world friendship and is crazy,
happy, the state, screamed and has not adopted the finishing moves,
the privacy smiles with musings... dissipating, calm pics, converses,
the photograph about mine health and the leader and the anger

Translated to French:
Au sujet de moi ? La dette, la main d'oeuvre et le personnel
pareillement approprié de principe de femme, il sont fâché obtenu,
par le pacifisme de soldat fou, transmet par le type de base et
est-ce que les boîtes de la radio 4 de le personnel, le poulet fou et
coloré de force... au sujet des jeux pèlent le blog ? Aime ma vie,
paix, l'amitié du monde et est fou, heureux, l'état, crié et n'a
pas adopté les mouvements de finissage, les sourires d'intimité avec
des rêveries... absorbant, PICS calme, inverses, la photographie au
sujet de la santé de mine et l'amorce et la colère

Translated back to English:
About me? Are the debt, the labour and the personnel pareillement
adapted of principle of woman, it annoyed obtained, by the pacifism of
insane soldier, transmits by the basic type and the boxes of radio 4
of the personnel, the insane and coloured chicken of force... about
the plays peel the blog? Like my life, peace, the friendship of the
world and is insane, happy, the state, shouted and did not adopt the
movements of finishing, the smiles of intimacy with daydreams...
absorbent, PEAKS calms, opposite, photography about the health of mine
and the starter and anger

Translated to German:
Über mich? Werden die Schuld, die Arbeit und das Personal
pareillement von der Grundregel der Frau angepaßt, es störten
erreicht, durch den Pazifismus des geisteskranken Soldaten,
überträgt nach dem grundlegenden Typen und die Kästen von Radio 4
des Personals, des geisteskranken und farbigen Huhns der Kraft...
über die Spiele ziehen dem blog ab? Wie meine Lebensdauer ist
Frieden, die Freundschaft der Welt und geisteskrank, glücklich, der
Zustand, geschrieen und nahm nicht die Bewegungen der Fertigung, das
Lächeln von Intimacy mit träumt... Saugstoff, SPITZEN beruhigt,
Entgegengesetztes, Fotographie über die Gesundheit von meinen und der
Starter und der Zorn an

Translated back to English:
Over me? Does the debt, which work and the personnel disturbed
pareillement adapted by the basic rule of the woman, it achieved,
become by the Pazifismus spirit-ill of the soldier, does transfer
after fundamental types and the boxes of radio 4 of the personnel, the
spirit-ill and colored chicken of the strength... over the plays takes
off blog? Like my life span peace, the friendship of the world and
spirit-ill, is lucky, the status, cried and did not take not the
movements of the manufacturing, which dreams smile of Intimacy with...
Sucking off, POINTS calms, opposite down, photography over the health
of my and the starters and the anger on

Translated to Italian:
Sopra me? il debito, che lavorano ed il pareillement disturbato
personali adattato dalla regola di base della donna, esso ha
realizzato, diventato dal Pazifismus spirito-malato del soldato,
trasferisce dopo i tipi fondamentali e le caselle della radio 4 dei
personali, del pollo spirito-malato e colorato della resistenza...
sopra i giochi toglie il blog? Come la mia pace della durata,
l'amicizia del mondo ed il spirito-malato, è fortunati, la
condizione, gridata e non hanno preso non i movimenti del
manufacturing, cui sorriso di sogni di intimacy con... Succhiando
fuori, i PUNTI calma, di fronte a giù, la fotographia sopra la salute
dei miei e dispositivi d'avviamento e della rabbia sopra

Translated back to English:
Over me? the debit, that they work and the pareillement disturbed
personal adapted from the rule of base of the woman, it has realized,
become from the spirit-sick Pazifismus of the soldier, transfers after
the fundamental types and the cases of radio 4 of the personal, of the
pollo spirit-sick and colored of the resistance... over the games
remove the blog? Like my peace of the duration, the friendship of the
world and the spirit-sick one, are fortunate, the condition, screaied
and they have not taken not the movements of the manufacturing, which
smile of dreams of intimacy with... Sucking outside, the POINTS calm,
of forehead down, the fotographia over the health of mine and
dispositi you of starter and of the anger over

Translated to Portuguese:
Sobre mim? o débito, aquele que trabalham e o pessoal perturbado
pareillement adaptado da régua da base da mulher, realizou, tornado
do Pazifismus espírito-doente do soldado, transferências após os
tipos fundamentais e as caixas do rádio 4 do pessoal, do pollo
espírito-doente e colorido da resistência... sobre os jogos removem
o blog? Como minha paz da duração, o friendship do mundo e
espírito-doente, são afortunados, a circunstância, screaied e não
fêz exame não dos movimentos do manufacturing, que sorriso dos
sonhos do intimacy com... Sugando fora, os PONTOS acalmam-se, da testa
para baixo, o fotographia sobre a saúde da mina e dispositi você do
acionador de partida e da raiva sobre

Translated back to English:
On me? the debit, that one that they work and the staff insane
pareillement customized of the ruler of the base of the woman, carried
through, become of the Pazifismus spirit-sick person of the soldier,
transferences after the basic types and the boxes of radio 4 of the
staff, pollo spirit-sick person and colored of the resistance... on
the games remove blog? As my peace of the duration, friendship of the
world and spirit-sick person, they are fortunate, the circumstance,
screaied and not fêz examination not of the movements of
manufacturing, that smile of the dreams of intimacy with... Sucking
outside, the POINTS are calmed, of the forehead for low, the
fotographia on the health of the mine and dispositi you of the paddle
of start and the anger on

Translated to Spanish:
¿En mí? ¿el debe, aquél que trabajan y el pareillement insano del
personal modificado para requisitos particulares de la regla de la
base de la mujer, llevado a través, pasado con la persona
alcohol-enferma de Pazifismus del soldado, transferences después de
los tipos básicos y los rectángulos de la radio 4 del personal,
persona alcohol-enferma del pollo y coloreado de la resistencia... en
los juegos quitan el blog? Como mi paz de la duración, de la amistad
del mundo y de la persona alcohol-enferma, son afortunados, la
circunstancia, screaied y no examinación del fêz no de los
movimientos de la fabricación, con los cuales la sonrisa de los
sueños de la intimidad... Aspirando afuera, las PUNTAS se calman, de
la frente para el punto bajo, el fotographia en la salud de la mina y
dispositi usted de la paleta del comienzo y de la cólera encendido

Translated back to English:
In me? it must, that one that they work and pareillement insano of the
personnel modified for particular requirements of the rule of the base
of the woman, taken to traverse, passed with the alcohol-ill person of
Pazifismus of the soldier, transferences after the basic types and the
rectangles of radio 4 of the personnel, alcohol-ill person of the
colored chicken and of the resistance... in the games clear blog? Like
my peace of the duration, of the friendship of the world and the
alcohol-ill person, they are lucky, the circumstance, screaied and
nonexaminación of fêz not of the movements of the manufacture, with
which the smile of the dreams of the privacy... Aspiring outside, the
ENDS calm, of the forehead for the low point, fotographia in the
health of the mine and dispositi you of the trowel of the beginning
and the ignited rage

I found that fab site through the worryingly disappeared French Mistress blog.

Project Chanology.

A group of 'Anonymous' people have commenced Project Chanology, launching an online attack on Scientology, naming it a dangerous cult and a brainwashing cult.

My work here is done.

Justice for rape victims

Justice for rape victims

Please add your signature to the open letter at the link above, addressed to Jacqui Smith, the Home Secretary.

Every 34 minutes a rape is reported to the police in the United Kingdom. Thousands more victims do not come forward.

Yet women are being failed by the criminal justice system, and left with nowhere to turn for support. We need your help to make a difference.

Please add your signature, and we will present the letter to her after the end of the campaign on 8th March, International Women's Day.

If you have any problems signing online, please email your name and organisation (if appropriate) to petition@fawcettsociety.org.uk or call us on 020 7253 2598 and we will add your name to the letter.

Petition:
Dear Home Secretary

Every 34 minutes a rape is reported to the police in the United Kingdom. Thousands more victims do not come forward.

Yet despite the scale of the problem, the Government has failed to provide the support that women want and need. The few remaining rape crisis centres are at risk of closing due to inadequate and insecure funding, and the vast majority of women in the UK have nowhere to turn to for support in their local area.

Not only are women who have been raped denied access to support, they are also denied access to justice. Only one out of every twenty rapes reported to the police results in a conviction, with less than one in five rapes even leading to a prosecution. This failure to bring rapists to justice amounts to a near ‘licence to rape’.

Money must be invested in support services without delay, so that every area has a fully-funded rape crisis centre, while the Government must take immediate steps to ensure that real improvements are made in criminal justice practice, so that every case is properly investigated.

The Government must do more for victims of rape. We call on you to give this issue the political priority that it deserves.

Some Astrologists They Are!

'We regret to announce that due to unforeseen circumstances beyond our control, the publication of The Astrological Magazine will cease with the December 2007 issue.'

Disgraceful!

A terminally ill Ghanaian woman has been removed from hospital in Wales to be deported, because her Visa had run out. I'm so disgusted with my country's lack of care, humanity and basic respect.

Cancer Patient Loses Visa Battle
A Ghanaian woman who came to the UK five years ago and became a student is being flown back to the African country, despite being terminally ill.

Ama Sumani was taken by immigration officers from a Cardiff hospital where she has been receiving dialysis for a year after cancer damaged her kidneys.

Ms Sumani, 39, whose visa has expired, said she cannot afford care in Ghana.

Her solicitor said they had pleaded compassionate grounds. The Home Office said it examined each case "with care".

Before leaving, she had been comforted by a nurse in a day-room at the University Hospital of Wales.

The immigration service arrived at 0800 GMT.

Ms Sumani was tearful but calm when she left hospital in a wheelchair with five immigration officials, one carrying her suitcase, and she was driven away.

She left on a flight from Heathrow to Ghana at 1435 GMT.

The cancer she is suffering from - malignant myeloma - would ordinarily be treated with a bone marrow transplant, but she was not entitled to the treatment.

The dialysis treatment she has been receiving is helping to prolong her life and her last treatment was on Tuesday evening.

Legal status

But it needs to be repeated regularly and there are concerns she would not be able to access dialysis treatment centres in Ghana.

Health care there is also private but Ms Sumani said she could not afford it.

A spokesman for Ghana's high commission in London said the country had two fully-equipped hospitals in Accra and further north in Kumasi.

He did concede that access to treatment was costly but said that if Ms Sumani was a member of the Ghana national health insurance scheme she would still receive treatment.

A friend Janet Simmons said Ms Sumani was a widow and a mother of two children, who were currently being looked after by members of her church in Ghana.

She first came to the UK as a visitor in 2003, but then changed her status to student and attempted to enrol on a banking course at a city college, her solicitor explained.

Ms Sumani's lack of English prevented her from pursuing the course and she went to find work which contravened her student visa.

In 2005 she returned to Ghana to attend a memorial service for her dead husband.

But when she came back to the UK her student visa was revoked and she was only given temporary admission which effectively meant she was given notice she would be removed, her solicitor said.

She did not keep in touch with immigration officials and was first taken ill in January 2006. Without the dialysis doctors fear she only has weeks to live.

Her solicitor said she accepted her removal was fair but said they had made representations on her behalf on compassionate grounds.

Ms Sumani is being removed from the country rather than deported because of her expired visa which means she has no legal status in the UK.

A removal means that in theory she could apply to return to the UK in the future.

A spokesman for the Border and Immigration agency said said it would not remove from the UK anyone who they believe is at risk on their return.

"Part of our consideration when a person is removed is their fitness to travel and whether the necessary medical treatment is available in the country to which we are returning," he added.

"Removals are always carried out in the most sensitive way possible, treating those being removed with courtesy and dignity." (my emphasis. Bastards)