You look fine. You really do. All of you.

It is no longer enough to hate your breasts, face, stomach, legs, nose, ears and lips enough to get them sliced and diced or injected with poison. It's no longer enough to have society tell you that your body is so very unacceptable that you should risk your life having major surgery in order to make it fit patriarchal 'rules' about thinness, pertness, tightness, hairlessness and perfection.

Now, you have to apply the same thinking to your vagina. Are the muscles stretched? Are your labia too big - or too small? Is your mons pubis too big - or too small? Ditto clitoris. Well, you can have those cut up too.

That article actually says,

So, if you or your partner is not satisfied with your vagina, a rejuvenation procedure can work wonders.

Your partner? If s/he is not happy with your vagina, that is entirely their problem! And is not ever a good reason for you to have it chopped up. In fact, if they are criticising your vulva or vagina, they certainly don't deserve you.

Amy Clare's review of a Channel 4 programme about 'designer vaginas' is worth reading.

I have had surgery twice this year, and the fear and pain associated with them made me think a lot about, and seriously question, why people would put themselves through that voluntarily. Just how strong are society's pressures, that they cause women to go through massive pain and lots of health risks, to get a smoother face or less saggy boobs?

When a woman chooses to have cosmetic surgery, I feel sad. Until we live in a society where what we look like is not used to oppress us, I question how much free choice we ever really have to make these decisions.

Help Make It Stop

Via Women's Views on News, I discovered this video from the Metropolitan Police, telling people to dial 999 if they hear domestic violence attacks through the walls from their neighbours.



It shows the shocking statistic that almost 1 in 5 murders in London are the result of domestic violence, and ends with the statement, You make the call. We'll make it stop.

It's an issue that has provoked discussion with my friends over the years. Many, many of us have been in this situation, hearing arguments next door escalate, and wondering what to do.

I personally have dialled 999 when things sounded like they were getting really out of hand, but it wasn't an easy decision. When you do dial 999, you fear that you will make things worse for the woman, when the man is released, if he is taken into custody at all. You fear that the police will not take it seriously. You even fear that you may be misinterpreting the situation, despite the smashing and screaming that you really can't mistake.

But I did dial, on more than one occasion, because I feared that that would, indeed, be the time that he would kill her. Because I could not bear to hear her suffering and terror any longer. Because I could not live with myself if I just sat there and allowed it to happen. Because she was being beaten, her furniture was being thrown, and nobody should need to tolerate that. Because I could hear her daughter crying upstairs.

I dialled 999, but even having done it I was never 100% sure it had been the right thing. If it would make him more aggressive to her later. If the police would 'make it stop' at all. In the end I spoke to my neighbour alone, asked her if I had done the right thing, and asked whether I should I do it again, if necessary. She was a proud woman, and said she was fine, but did eventually agree that if it sounded really bad, I should call for help.

So what about you? Have you dialled 999 in that situation? Have you wanted to, but not dared? Have you decided against it? And why? What made you call, or what made you not call?

Rapist Urged Not to Rape

My local paper has published an article following the sexual assault of a woman. They report that the police are urging a change in behaviour to prevent further rapes. Sadly, contrary to the title of this post, the change in behaviour they are encouraging involves the behaviour of local women, who are advised to not walk alone on the paths of the Dearne Valley Trail.

So, I would like to make a few changes to the article. My alterations are in bold

POLICE have issued this image of a man who subjected a 50-year-old woman to a terrifying sex attack as she walked her dog at a South Yorkshire beauty spot.
The man assaulted the woman as she he walked alone on a secluded path on the Dearne Valley Trail, near Elsecar, Barnsley, at around midday on Thursday June 24.

The stockily-built attacker was white, around 30 years old, with short fair hair and a round face. He was wearing blue shorts and a white T-shirt and fled towards Elsecar Park following the attack.

Police are warning people using the trail to be vigilant and report suspicious activity immediately. They are also urging women not to walk the paths alone. They are particularly urging the rapist to stop raping, and want men to be aware that if they walk the paths alone, they may cause alarm to the women in the area, due to this recent attack.

Det Sgt Steve Trigg, from South Yorkshire Police, said the woman was left "traumatised and in shock" after the serious sex assault, and feared she might be killed.

Anyone with information about the attack should call 0114 2202020 ext 736551.

Not Ever

Rape Crisis Scotland have created a TV advert, aimed at tackling prejudice against rape victims.


It follows a survey carried out by the Scottish government, which found that 23% of people thought a woman was partly responsible for being raped if she was drunk at the time of the attack, and 17% if she was wearing revealing clothing.

Their campaign ad helps to make the point that a woman is never, ever responsible for being raped. Never. Not if she is drunk, not if she has said yes before, not if she said yes to your friend, not if she is naked in the street.

Their website is a good source of information, and also has posters available for download, and details of a national helpline.

As I learned on my first ever Reclaim the Night march,
"Whatever we wear, wherever we go,
yes means yes and no means no".

Small Commitment for a Big Society

Rape Crisis (England and Wales) has organised a campaign for sustainable funding for Rape Crisis centres, as there are areas without services at all, and other areas where the existing services are under threat of closure.

They are therefore asking for reassurance from the Coalition Government that it will keep its sustainable funding commitment to Rape Crisis.

As someone who has used my local Rape Crisis centre, I can only praise how well they support women and girls, and that service no longer existing would be devastating for my city. Statistics for sexual violence are not going down, and we certainly need more specialist, independent women-only services for survivors, not risk there being even fewer.

On their facebook page for this campaign, they have suggestions of things that we can do:

• Join our supporters’ group on Facebook
• Publicise the group and this event page to all your Facebook friends and encourage others to join and do the same
• Send a letter to Theresa May MP, Home Secretary and Minister for Women and Equalities, voicing your support for a specific, long-term, sustainable fund for Rape Crisis groups, so that the crisis in Rape Crisis ends once and for all. You can write your own, or use our template letter to urge David and Theresa to honour their commitment to Rape Crisis (England and Wales). Find the template on our group page
• Ask your MP to support the right of sexual violence victims/survivors in your area to access vital Rape Crisis services. You can find out how to contact your local MP at: www.theyworkforyou.com
• Ask your MP and the Government for parity with the Scottish model of funding for Rape Crisis in England and Wales:
The National Co-ordinator of Rape Crisis Scotland describes the impact of having a Rape Crisis Specific Fund there:

‘Even though some centres are still struggling, the general funding situation has improved significantly over the past four years...Because the funding is restricted to Rape Crisis groups, centres no longer have to compete with one another; this has made a huge difference in terms of the service and support they can offer women. Four new centres have also opened in areas where previously there was little or no service provision. ‘

Along with the numerous verbal public and parliamentary statements promising sustainable funding for Rape Crisis from both the Conservative and Liberal Democrat parties, the Coalition Government has told us that it will adopt a ‘common sense’ attitude to addressing the ‘needs of society by enabling funding to deliver innovative and personalised services to the community.’

They have committed to:
• Freedom
• Fairness
• Responsibility

Big Words ...but when will they become a Big Reality? Support women and girls who’ve been affected by sexual violence to have their voices heard by insisting that the Government honours its commitment.

Don’t forget: Send our template letter to Theresa May MP, Home Secretary and Minister for Women and Equalities, asking that she honours the Coalition Government’s commitment to provide long-term sustainable funding for Rape Crisis centres

I will also reproduce the template letter they provide here, for those who don't use facebook. It is to Theresa May, the Home Secretary and Minister for Women and Equalities.

Please do send it if you agree with the sentiment, and feel free to alter it to add things you feel are important to get across.

Rt. Hon Theresa May MP #Your Address #
Home Office
Peel Building
2 Marsham Street
London
SW1P 4DF

# Date#

Dear Home Secretary,

I am writing to you (or Organisation’s Name is writing to you) to seek your assurance that the Coalition Government will HONOUR its publicly stated COMMITMENT to provide long-term sustainable funding for Rape Crisis centres affiliated to Rape Crisis (England and Wales) (RCEW) by providing a specific Rape Crisis fund.

The new Government has stated, in its Coalition agreement, ‘Our Programme for Government’ (May 2010), and reiterated within parliamentary debates and public interviews, that it will support the sustainability and development of Rape Crisis provision in England and Wales.

This commitment came about as a result of the publicly acknowledged critical situation that member groups of RCEW are experiencing, as highlighted by ‘The Crisis in Rape Crisis’ and other independent reports over the last decade. It was also an outcome of continued and consistent lobbying and campaigning by RCEW and their supporters, who are gravely concerned about the consequences of the historic neglect and lack of funding for Rape Crisis groups, which led to 10 centres closing in the preceding 5 years. The Government’s commitment was a response to these specific issues facing Rape Crisis (England and Wales) member groups.

Independent research and survivors’/victims’ testimonies consistently show that the majority of survivors/victims of sexual violence are women and girls who do not report to the police and prefer to access women-only services. Many of these survivors/victims will, therefore, prefer to access their local Rape Crisis centre as they provide specialist, women-centred services, which are distinctive within the Third Sector.

However, a lack of sustainable funding means that, for the majority of England and Wales, Rape Crisis Centres do not exist in many areas and the ones that do exist are under threat. This reduces women’s and girls’ choices and opportunities in accessing specialised, local support for sexual violence and this does not promote a fair, just and Big Society.

I (or Organisation’s name) urge you to honour the commitment and to work with Rape Crisis (England and Wales) to ensure that all member groups are able to access the promised funding.

Yours sincerely,

Father's Day

It's Father's Day, the day every year I try not to get too bitter at having lost him.

When I was a kid, sometimes during half-term holidays I used to go to his work with him, when he was a German lecturer.

One day I sat in his class when they were doing an aural comprehension exercise, which in this case involved listening to a song and answering questions about it.

To keep me from too much boredom, I joined in with the class and listened to the song on headphones, and for some reason it totally captivated me. I made him put it on a tape for me and I listened to it again and again through my early childhood. My obsession with listening endlessly to quirky and odd pieces of music still hasn't waned to this day.

Then I remember coming home from University once and asking Dad if he still had the song on tape anywhere. He hunted round, found it and played it, and we listened to it again. This time, I asked what it was about, and it was totally disillusioning to find out that it's pretty reprehensible. The gist of it is a man telling his children not to play with the gypsy children in the woods, because they were naughty and dirty, but to play with their brothers instead. I was gutted, that this song I had so adored, was so offensive.

But, for the sake of nostalgia, here it is. My genius brother found this and we're pretty sure it's the very version we used to listen to.



'Spiel nicht mit den Schmuddelkindern' sung by Franz-Josef Degenhardt.

Spoonless Substitute

If I had the spoons, I could perhaps have written a whole post on each of the links below, but my body is overtaking everything else at the moment, so here is a collection of some writings on the internet which have caught my eye in the last few days.

Does your iPod support rape in the Congo?, looking at rape being used as a weapon in areas of conflict over minerals used in electronics.

Disability Terminology: A Starter Kit for Non-Disabled People and the Media. I like that she acknowledges that she's coming from an American perspective, where the preferred language used by disabled people is often different from in the UK, and she makes some great points, including one expanded on by Elena Newley in "I don't suffer!".

FWD's Ableist Word Profiles are always worth a read, too, discussing disablist language further.

I loved this story about 9 women in Northern Ireland who have been acquitted of criminal damage after breaking into the premises of an arms manufacturing company. Impressively, the jury agreed with them that rather than commit a crime, they had in fact taken action to prevent crime and "protect the lives and property of people in the Gaza Strip and to stop alleged war crimes being committed by the Israeli forces".

Other stories and writing I've found thought-provoking and interesting are:

Women's health shortchanged because of bias towards male subjects in studies

The potential and the danger of first person in feminist discourse

Informed Choice or Restricted Right on thinking of abortion as a right rather than a choice.

The Absence of No: Re-considering the Yes focus in critique of rape culture

Where the Fight Against Child Obesity Can Go Very, Very Wrong

and 'Biggest Loser' TV programme finalist says the show gave her an eating disorder.

Greencoat Boy Packs a Punch to Equality.

One great thing about the internet, which is helped a lot by twitter, is the immediacy of information. When something goes wrong, all sorts of people can rally round and react, sometimes within minutes of the event itself.

So things happened like that tonight. @LGBTLabour posted the following messages on their twitterfeed.



Within minutes, this became a Trending Topic on twitter, meaning it was one of the most talked about things at that time. The discussion, now with the tag #bigotbar, is still ongoing. And people are starting to discuss actions like boycotts, and mass emails to the Punch Taverns who own the pub involved.

As Grace Fletcher-Harwood has said, they picked the wrong LGBTs to mess with! She also gives links to some pub review sites which accept comments on pubs, and the contact details of the Chair of Licensing for Westminster Council.

Sarah Brown joined in, with



All of that is why I love the internet.

But then, as quickly as things rise, they can also start to descend. A few jokes here and there. A few jibes. The point that someone has been treated so appallingly on the basis of their gender or sexuality gets overtaken by the vital importance of a witty pun on the situation. Equally, facts start to change a little, and get edited and shortened, often cutting out key information.

The F Word's own Helen was one of those who pointed out that



So let's stop introducing exclusivity and bullying into a human rights matter. The Greencoat Boy pub have actually broken the law, in refusing to provide a service to people on the grounds of their sexuality and gender. That goes against The Equality Act 2010, I'm told.

If you are as angry as I am about this, those links above, in this post, will give you a place to start on what action you might want to take. There are people to contact, and if you want to boycott premises in your area which are run by Punch Taverns, you can find out where your local Punch Taverns pubs are here.

And keep an eye out for updates - here on The F Word of course, with a Greencoat Boy search on twitter, on blogs and such.

I am so, so glad that our society is in a place where many people's initial reaction to something like this is to be outraged, not resigned to it. That the people involved want to fight, rather than feel shamed by these bigoted actions. That others are jumping in, sharing information and working stuff out together to try and make this the last, ever, place in Britain that refuses service to someone because of their gender or sexuality.

Well, we can dream.

Edited to add, another great point has been made by @Lisybabe:

Signal Boost: Feminism and Mental Health – Call for Submissions

Found via FWD (feminists with disabilities) blog:

Feminism and Mental Health – Call for Submissions – Deadline: June 1, 2010

Call for Submissions:

The lived experience(s) of mental health in feminist communities

Call for submissions from people of any gender who identify with feminism and have lived experiences of a psychiatric diagnosis.

Our upcoming anthology, Feminist’s Navigate Mental Health (working title), will explore the complexities of navigating mental health and how a feminist identity may (or may not) shape those experiences, thoughts and feelings.

Submissions are welcomed in the form of personal short stories.

The submissions received will shape the outcome of the book. The final
manuscript will be submitted to relevant independent publishers.

Possible themes may include (but are not limited to):
o Coping – what works and what doesn’t
o Any positive aspects of your mental health that are commonly considered deficits
o Treatment preferences and past experiences
o Medication
o Personal/lived understandings of your diagnosis (acceptance or rejection)
o Stigma/tension around mental health issues in the feminist community
o Feminism and well-being/strength/empowerment
o Feminism and distress

Guidelines:
o Remember to take care of yourself while writing about topics that may be distressing;
o Good writing skills are great, but not mandatory! We will work with you to edit your piece;
o Submissions should be saved in .doc or .rtf, size 12 font, Arial or Times New Roman, and double spaced;
o 500 to 4000 words
o Include contact information and a brief biography;
o Only email submissions will be accepted;
o Submission deadline is June 1st, 2010.

Who we are
The women behind this project are Jenna MacKay and Alicia Merchant. Jenna is a psychiatric survivor and community activist who is particularly interested in violence and mental health. Alicia is a freelance writer and contributing editor for various magazines and has been published in CR Magazine, thirdspace and the Globe & Mail. Both self-identify as feminist, are interested in critical perspectives of health and live in Toronto. This project is not affiliated with any institution or organization.

Comments, concerns, questions and submissions should be directed to:

fnmhsubmissions@gmail.com

Blogging Against Disablism Day: What Is Disablism?

What is disablism?

Disablism is arranging a meeting in an inaccessible venue.

Disablism is sitting in the 'priority' seats on public transport and not offering those seats to a disabled person, if you are not disabled yourself.

Disablism is when a doctor ignores physical health problems because you have mental health problems.

Disablism is parking in a disability car parking space when you are not disabled (even if it is *just for a minute*).

Disablism is using words like retard, psycho, spastic, handicapped and lame.

Disablism is thinking that making buildings accessible is 'bending over backwards' and political correctness gone mad.

Disablism is presuming that disabled people are less than you.

Disablism is not hiring a disabled person because of assumptions you have about their abilities or needs.

Disablism is staring at someone because they look different.

Disablism is making assumptions about what someone can and cannot do.

Disablism is making offensive jokes about a group of people on the basis of their impairment.

Disablism is presuming that disabled people's lives must be awful.

Disablism is casting a non-disabled person to play a disabled person in a play or TV show.

Disablism is disability hate crime.

Disablism is refusing to prescribe contraception to a learning disabled person because they can't possibly want to have sex.

Disablism is not acknowledging that many disabled people experience discrimination on multiple levels.

Disablism is frequently institutionalised.

Disablism is assumptions.

Disablism is not asking whether your event needs a sign language interpreter.

Disablism is going ahead and doing what you think might help, rather than asking someone what would help.

Disablism is refusing to prosecute men who rape mentally ill or learning disabled women, because the women are 'unreliable witnesses'.

Disablism is thinking that you don't need to consider access needs, because disabled people don't come to your events (and not wondering why they don't).

Disablism is assuming that someone you haven't met (or even that you have) is not disabled.

Disablism is presuming that people diagnosed with schizophrenia are dangerous and violent.

Disablism is thinking it is less tragic when a disabled person kills themselves than it is when a non-disabled person does.

Disablism is presumptions about 'quality of life'.

Disablism is behind all these news stories.

Disablism is sacking somebody when they become ill or disabled.

Disablism is not in the dictionary.

Disablism is telling us we are being punished for something we did in a past life.

Disablism is thinking that if someone doesn't look disabled, then they are not.

Disablism is ignoring somebody because you don't understand.

Disablism is thinking that disabled people 'have it too easy these days' and are therefore being overly demanding if they want to be able to get into a building.

(cross-posted at the f word)

Plans for Sunflower Day :D

If you want to meet up to plant the sunflowers, we will be meeting at 12 midday outside the Blue Moon cafe in Sheffield city centre, by the Cathedral. Please be prompt!

Alternatively, you can plant some seeds wherever you are in your locality.

There is also now a flickr group for this event. And there will be an indymedia article up when it publishes!

Check the posts below for other info and link regarding this event.

Sheffield Sunflower Day Approaching!

Plans are afoot for International Sunflower Guerrilla Day in Sheffield.

Some people will be meeting in the city centre at 12 to take a walk and plant some blooms, others will be doing it individually or with friends in their areas.

Keep an eye on the facebook group, or on sheffieldsunflowers.org.uk for the latest.

The Election Is A Comin'

I'm not recruiting for votes. I haven't even conclusively decided who I'm voting for. So I thought I'd share some of the tools and sites I've been looking at to help me to decide who will get a cross on my ballot paper, and who will definitely not!

There are quizzes like Who Should You Vote For? online, where you tell them your attitudes to policies, and they tell you at the end which parties your views seem to coincide with the most.

Abortion Rights are doing an election campaign. You can download a factsheet, and lobby your candidates via the site. You just type in your postcode and it lets you email all your local candidates. It then requests that you let them know your candidates' responses to their questions on abortion rights, so that others who enter their postcode can see where everyone stands.

I have only had a response from one candidate (Green, and she answered the way I hoped she would), but hopefully the others will be forthcoming too.

Similarly, the UK Disabled People's Council have put together a list of questions which you may want to question your prospective MPs about.

MyGayVote.co.uk has pie charts showing how the different parties have fared in terms of their past votes on LGBT issues.

Planet Mouret Films is "a blog designed for learning disabled adults and those who are involved in the LD community", with lots of straight forward information about the general election, links to easy-read information about voting, easy-read manifestos and the rights of learning disabled adults to vote.

And Scope are urging "local authorities to act immediately to make sure polling stations are more accessible. They have warned that some people may find it difficult to vote in next month’s elections but said it was not too late for councils to make a difference."

(Cross-posted at The F Word)

Sheffield Sunflowers: Domain Name!

We have a domain name! From now on, www.sheffieldsunflowers.org.uk will lead to the latest updates on International Sunflower Guerrilla Day.

Sheffield: International Sunflower Guerrilla Gardening Day

May 1st is International Sunflower Guerrilla Day, where people all over the world (well, probably the northern hemisphere) go out and plant sunflower seeds in places around where they live.

Having just read On Guerrilla Gardening: A Handbook for Gardening without Boundaries, I am feeling totally inspired and have started to organise an event for this magical day here in Sheffield.

There is a thread on the Guerrillagardening.org forums, and a facebook group for the event. Sign up for either of those to keep up to date with the plans, or keep an eye open here for news.

What you will need:

Sunflower seeds.
A bottle of water.
Something to make holes with (pencil, screwdriver, trowel, or in my case, a crutch!).

What to do:
Dig a small hole about 2cm deep, drop in a seed. Cover with soil. Water.

That's it! As many times as you like, in as many places as you feel will be cheered up by a glorious sunflower in a couple of months.

I've been stocking up on sunflower seeds at various bargain shops, if you grab a pack or two each time you see them, you should have plenty by the date.

There will be people meeting somewhere central to go and garden together, and others individually planting seeds where they are. Wherever you are, Sheffield or not, join in. Just imagine how happy you, and others, will be when there are unexpected sunflowers around!

12 Reasons I Won't Follow You Back on Twitter

You are unlikely to get a refollow if...

1. You post about diets.

2. Your posts are in a language I don't speak.

3. You post about gaining thousands of followers in a night, and you have a total of 34 followers.

4. You are following more than 10x the number of people who are following you.

5. You follow, unfollow, refollow, unfollow and refollow me so that I get notifications about you in my email several times a day.

6. You are any kind of spammer or bot.

7. Your posts are hidden. I don't want to request permission when I don't know what it's for.

8. You have no profile information.

9. Your profile information is inane.

10. You are sharing the love of Jesus.

11. Hate speech. Pretty much any.

12. You like Jeremy Clarkson.

Otherwise, go for it! So, follow me if you dare!

More of this stuff

More 'give up your seat for someone who needs it more' links. Proper analysis and posts will follow asap.

People who don't give up their seat to someone in need

Make my day - offer a pregnant lady your Tube seat

When on a bus should a young person give up their seat for an elderly person? If so, how old does the person have to be...you wouldn't want to offend anyone!

NYC packs some punch behind plea to give the disabled your seat

Japanese train poster #1

Japanese train poster #2

Not Everyone "Stands Up for People with Disabilities"

Anthony Barnes: Standing room only (even on crutches)

do people give up their seat on the bus/train?

Give up your seat and make someone's day -- whether they're pregnant or not

Giving up your seat on the bus to someone who needs it more

The Supertram Problem Exists Worldwide.

Following my post yesterday about people not giving up 'priority seats' on Sheffield Supertram for disabled people, I have found some interesting links online.

I was reading Man on Crutches on Train with Camera and, about 2/3 of the way down, some words sounded familiar - I realised they were linking to a comment I made on the subject last April!

That article actually has some really interesting thoughts and information, which I want to look at in more detail when I have the chance. And it is talking about this blog, named People Who Sit In The Disability Seats When I'm Standing On My Crutches, where the creator took photos of those very people. This blog has not been posted on for nearly a year now, sadly. Though I could create my own alternative for Sheffield trams!

Another article I've found is The iPhone Vigilante, about the blog mentioned above. And I also found a discussion board message on the same issue, but in Singapore. This thread is another that I will havfe to read in better detail some other time, but one new idea I got from it is to suggest to Stagecoach that the messages announced through the tram system could include one about giving up your seat for someone who needs it more.

There is a discussion here, a yahoo discussion and a Facebook group, for those of you so inclined!

There will definitely be more happening on this issue, watch this space! (well, this blog at least).

Disabled Access to Stagecoach Supertram in Sheffield

Something has bewildered me for some time. It's that normally, when I'm on a bus in Sheffield, if none of the Priority seats are free, other passengers usually offer me a seat when they see my walking stick or crutches. However, when I take the tram, this virtually never happens. I have no idea why tram passengers don't do this when bus passengers do.

Offering me a seat is immensely helpful. Standing up for any period of time, even short periods, causes me pain. Balancing on a moving vehicle with only one free hand, or no free hands (depending on whether I'm using one or two crutches) is really difficult, when my balance is already bad. And being able to sit down, even for a short journey, helps to delay the inevitable exhaustion, which means I can hopefully get a bit more done, wherever I'm going.

Since I had surgery a month ago, I have needed to sit down more. Standing up causes me much more pain, and even the slightest things tire me out.

So, this morning, I emailed Supertram about this, saying:

Dear Supertram,

I use the buses and trams regularly in Sheffield, and whenever I take a bus, if there are no free seats, I am nearly always offered a seat when someone sees that I am using crutches or a walking stick. However, when I take the tram, I am virtually never offered a seat.

I do not know why this is the case, but people on buses seem to have a lot more respect for the 'Please give up this seat if a disabled person needs it' type signs than they do on trams.

It makes my tram journeys very difficult and painful, and is putting me off using them at all.

I was wondering if there is anything you feel you could do to help with this situation. I am obviously aware that there are people with invisible disabilities who would have every right to keep their seat, but that cannot be the case for everybody who stays in the 'disabled priority' seats when there are disabled people clearly struggling with standing.

The first things that come to my mind in terms of what you can do, are awareness raising campaigns on the trams themselves, and more proactive action from the conductors in this area.

I would appreciate your thoughts on the situation,

The response I received was, frankly, awful. They are taking no responsibility for their role and show no acknowledgement at all of my concerns.

They say:

I was concerned to hear that you find it difficult to use the priority seating if another passenger is already there. In the first instance I would suggest that you politely asked the passenger if they would leave the seat to enable you to use it . I agree with your point that some passengers may have an invisable inpairement [sic] but the seats are clearly marked and there should be no problem in the majority of cases. Experience has shown that not all passengers who warrant the use of the priority seats wish to do so and although I would expect conductors to assist when requested they will not always do so automatically. I will pass on your comments re awareness training but feel that the best way to "educate" able bodied passengers to give up the seats is if they are asked to do so by other passengers.

It's a cop-out. I feel, more strongly than ever, that they need to look at the 'Priority seats for disabled people' signs and see that whatever they currently have up is not doing the job, as people are paying no attention. There are only a few available seats which don't involve going up steps, so these need to be seriously prioritised. In addition, training the ticket inspectors in assisting disabled passengers to find a seat could be an effective way of combating the problems.

Interestingly, I was sent the link to this government consultation on Improving Bus Passenger Services today, and learned that:

7.9 We are seeking views on further ways to ensure stricter enforcement of the duties of drivers, inspectors and conductors with regard to disabled people. Conduct Regulations set out the duties of drivers/ conductors of regulated public service vehicles with respect to passengers in wheelchairs and other disabled persons. DfT’s guidance specifies that passengers who are not disabled but are occupying the wheelchair space could be asked to move to allow a passenger in a wheelchair to board, provided that there is room for the passenger to move elsewhere on the bus and the seating and standing capacity will not be exceeded. Drivers are also required to take reasonable steps to ensure the safety of their passengers.

7.10 The Public Service Vehicles Accessibility Regulations stipulate that there should be clear signage for the priority seat and the wheelchair space on the bus. The Department is committed to delivering transport that works for everyone. We have therefore been considering how enforcement of these regulations can be improved. Stricter compliance with the Conduct Regulations would go a long way in ensuring that the wheelchair space is available for a passenger in a wheelchair.

7.11 We therefore seek views on measures to ensure stricter compliance with the regulations in general, particularly on whether introduction of financial sanctions against operators who persistently breach any aspect of the regulations, would be useful.

Now, while this regulation is regarding buses, the trams in Sheffield provide a very similar service, and should take account of the current regulation and proposed changes. My safety is certainly compromised when I have to stand on their vehicles.

I don't know what steps to take next. I was hoping that a response from Stagecoach would be helpful and open to looking at improvements. However, their huge failure to take what I have requested into account has really disappointed me.

We Are Women Too

This video is of Eleanor Lisney and Michelle Daley, talking at Million Women Rise at the weekend, about disabled women's lives. About the reality of domestic violence committed against disabled women, including individual women's accounts, and about Fiona Pilkington who killed herself and her disabled daughter after being unable to get help against the abuse and intimidation they were suffering. About refuge provision - scarce at the best of times, and accessible provision being almost non-existent. About the particular vulnerability of disabled women when it comes to sexual assault and brutality in care homes or by carers, and the difficulties in reporting and being heard, as well as barriers to accessing services. And about multiple identities, and how disabled women can experience multiple discrimination from within the disability movement, other women, the community and society.

"It is about raising the voices of our disabled sisters. It is also about ensuring our recognition within this struggle for human rights. [...] We all have a responsibility to ensure that disabled women are recognised, and respected, as equals within this struggle, and all our voices to be heard. We are women too."

[Edited to add - There are transcripts of these speeches here, thank you so much to Eleanor, one of the speakers, for letting us know, and to Felix Gonzalez for making the videos and doing the transcription. More transcripts of speeches of the day will be published at http://connectculture.wordpress.com/ in due course.]