Gabcast - Hairy Women

Gabcast! incurable hippie's musings and rants #4




(previous post I refer to).

Image Mosaic - Self Portrait Challenge

made using image mosaic generator.

Week 3, online tools or cool tools.

More hippie photos.

Justice, For Once.

I used to live on Park Hill flats, a somewhat notorious council estate by Sheffield city centre.

There is always a lot to say about Park Hill, but for now I won't be going into that. I just need to talk about one incident, and today's long-awaited update on it.

In June 2002, I was woken by the smell of smoke. I leapt out of bed and went all the way round my flat, trying to find its source. When I couldn't find anything, I looked out of a window and saw the very clear cause. One of the flats opposite was very much on fire.

There was a huge amount of smoke, and I watched as one of the windows shattered with the heat, letting yet more smoke out. I saw that there were people around the flat door, and for some reason I presumed that the flat belonged to one of the women standing there. I grabbed my phone to call 999, when I saw firefighters arrive.

I was very frightened and disturbed by what I could see, and did not want to be part of that weird voyeuristic thing which happens to the best of people in situations like this, so I moved away from the window, and hoped the firefighters could get it under control quickly.

I was mainly relieved that the flat's occupant had got out.

Later that day I went down to the Co-op, which as well as being the local shop, also seemed to serve as social centre, marriage guidance, community news spreader and gossip centre of the estate.

Of course, all talk was of the fire. When I got to the till, I asked if anyone knew what had happened, and the woman serving me said, 'They're saying it's murder'.

I was stunned. Totally and utterly stunned. I had been convinced that that woman by the front door of the flat lived there. Why on earth had I thought that??

I was given more information - a woman was killed in the fire, she had had a stalker, one of her kids had seen the fire from the school playground, presumably not knowing their mum was dying in it. The thought was that the stalker did it.

Over the next few days, information began to be confirmed and denied. The situation was that this woman, June Bond, had 7 children. A man had been stalking her, and the flat which had been on fire was actually *his* flat. He was prime suspect, her death was being treated as murder, and he was being looked for.

The firefighters had struggled to get inside the flat to put out the fire, and once they had they were slowed down by the sheer heat and smoke. June Bond was dead.

I was terribly traumatised and disturbed by this whole event. Having seen the fire, I couldn't stop imagining how this (unknown to me) woman must have felt, dying in a fire. Unable to breathe? Burning? Worried about her kids? I had indirectly witnessed a murder and I couldn't get it out of my mind.

And then, after a few weeks, there was nothing. The flat remained boarded up, but talk got onto other matters and I learned nothing more.

This event comes to my mind still regularly, and I occasionally search the web for details of any kind of conviction or anything to follow up this woman's awful murder, but I found nothing.

So today, to read that the guy, Vincent King, had been convicted and sentenced to life, serving a minimum of 16 years, I felt so glad, so relieved.

It seems he had actually killed her with a claw hammer, and then set the flat on fire to cover his tracks. He'll be in there until at least 2018 which I'm glad about, but it doesn't seem half enough. He was stalking her, and had previously been in a relationship with her.

Yet again, a violent man kills their partner or ex-partner. Two women a week in Britain are killed by (ex-)partners. At least this time there is a conviction and something of a sentence.

16 Years for Murderer of Former Lover

A BRUTE who beat his ex-lover to death with a hammer and then tried to cover his tracks by arson must spend at least 16 years behind bars.
Vincent King, aged 59, of Norwich Row, Park Hill, was found guilty at Sheffield Crown Court in November 2002 of murdering mother-of-seven June Bond.

He had already pleaded guilty to arson being reckless as to whether life was
endangered. He was jailed for life.

Now his tariff - the minimum number of years he must spend in prison before he can seek parole - has been set at 16 years by Mr Justice McCombe, who was reviewing the case at the High Court in London.

Even taking into account the time he spent on remand, the ruling means King will not be able to even apply for his freedom before 2018.

Mr Justice McCombe said he had taken into account the fact King had been left in a "distressed mental state" when it emerged Ms Bond had begun seeing a neighbour, Oswald Darmudas.

But he also observed that King had a number of previous convictions for violence, including one against Ms Bond.

The judge also said he had tried to cover up the murder by starting a fire.

The court heard King met Ms Bond, who was 14 years younger than him, in 2001. In May 2002 she began seeing Mr Darmudas and split with King, but he 'stalked' her and discovered her new relationship.

On June 12 2002, he lured her to his flat by saying he had money for her, said Mr Justice McCombe, before killing her with a single blow to the head from a claw hammer.

At around 6.50am the next day he bought petrol from a filling station and set fire to his own flat with Ms Bond's body inside.

Self-Portrait Challenge - Online Tools 2.

Following my first of the online tools self-portrait challenges, here is my second.



It was created using the warholizer from fd's flickr toys.

My flickr page is here, and visit also the self-portrait challenge homepage.

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Technorati tags: self-portrait challenge; andy warhol; incurable_hippie; self-portrait; digital imagery.

The Difference between Self-Harm and Suicide.

Dear John O,

Thank you for your emails, which I always read with interest and concern, and usually respond as best I can to calls for action.

I had to respond to this one, though, because of the way you are classing self-harm and attempted suicide as one and the same thing. This is just factually incorrect and very misleading.

There are many reasons why people self-harm, but it is most frequently a coping mechanism, indeed something which people can use in an attempt to *prevent* themselves getting to the point where they may end up attempting or committing suicide.
Some info:

There are probably as many reasons for self-harming as there are self-harmers.

Some people find that when they self-harm they experience a "release" which they cannot achieve in any other way. This can be a huge relief if feelings of depression, anger, self-hatred, fear or anxiety are becoming overwhelming.

Others find that when emotional pain becomes unbearable, if they hurt themselves in some way it transfers the pain to physical pain on the body. For many, physical pain (e.g. from a cut or a burn) is much easier to deal with than deep emotional pain.

On a similar note, some people find that hurting themselves physically gives them more control over their pain and their lives. Whereas it is difficult to control the emotional pain you may feel, if you then take charge of the pain and are in control of it, this can seem easier to deal with.

On the surface it could appear that self harming is similar to suicidal behaviour, especially if people are cutting their wrists, or overdosing. However for an awful lot of people, self harm is known to prevent suicide. By the means I mentioned above, self harm can take the edge off overwhelming feelings, and thus make someone less likely to attempt or commit suicide.

Some people self harm as a way of punishing themselves. If they feel guilty for something they have done, said or thought, they may then cut or burn or otherwise harm themselves because it is what they feel they deserve. Often the "punishment" is much more severe than is warranted, for example someone slashing their wrists because they overslept.

Self harm can also be anger turned inwards. For women in today's society, showing outward signs of anger is a socially unacceptable behaviour so if someone angers them, instead of shouting at them or taking their anger out in other ways, they may self harm to get rid of the supposedly unacceptable angry feelings.

There is also a scientific theory which could explain some people's self harming behaviours too. This is the theory that when we are in physical pain, endorphins ("happy" chemicals) are released into the body, leading to something resembling a "high". So when someone is feeling especially down or depressed, self harming could lead to a boost of endorphins which could make them feel better, albeit temporarily.

I would actually be surprised if incidents of true self-harm were not higher than those you quoted below. The disgraceful number of attempted suicides is probably much smaller than the incidences of self-harm which may often be well hidden and never receive medical treatment. So by merging the two in your mail you are possibly even downplaying the actual number of self-harm incidents.

Thanks for reading, hippie


John O wrote:

> ===========
> NCADC News Service
> ===========
>
> Self-Harm in Immigration Removal Centres
>
> Every other day a detainee incarcerated in a UK Immigration Removal Centre (IRC), makes an attempt at self-harm (suicide), serious enough to require medical treatment.
>
> In the 10 months from April 2006 to January 2007 there were 176 attempts to self-harm that required medical treatment. That is one incident of self-harm every 1.7 days.
>
> In the same period, 1,643 detainees were put on 'Formal Self-Harm at Risk'.
>
> Detainees and campaigners believe the actual numbers are way higher than those reported.
>
> Since the first Immigration Removal Centre opened in the UK, there have been 10 deaths from self-harm.
>
> Number of incidents of Self-Harm requiring medical treatment January 2007
>
> Campsfield House 1
> Colnbrook 12
> Dover 4
> Dungavel 0
> Harmondsworth 1
> Haslar 0
> Lindholme 0
> Oakington 1
> Tinsley House 0
> Yarl's Wood 1
>
>
> Number of individuals on 'Formal Self-Harm at Risk' January 2007
>
> Campsfield House 0
> Colnbrook 77
> Dover 10
> Dungavel 9
> Harmondsworth 3
> Haslar 3
> Lindholme 3
> Oakington 3
> Tinsley House 5
> Yarl's Wood 15
>
> A full break down for the 10 months April 2006 to January 2007;
> http://www.ncadc.org.uk/resources/self-harm2006.html
>
> 46 asylum seekers/migrants in the UK, have taken their own lives (since 2000)
> 30 in the community - 6 in prisons
> 10 in Immigration Removal Centres
> Details: http://www.ncadc.org.uk/resources/selfharm.html
>
> End of Bulletin:
>
> Source for this Message:
> NCADC
>
>--
>
> Disclaimer:
>
> NCADC's email bulletins are an important part of our work in educating the public on immigration, asylum and anti-deportation issues. As part of that work our bulletins hosts news and views from different individuals, organisations and campaigns working in the same field as us.
>
> The contents of this bulletin are the sole responsibility of the author/s and should not be taken as endorsement of any kind by NCADC.
> NCADC takes no responsibility for the content of external websites linked from our bulletins and links should not be taken as endorsement of any kind.
> NCADC reserves the right to omit or edit the whole or any part of material submitted for publication.
> Viruses: Although NCADC take great care in scanning all emails and attachments with the latest Anti-viirus software before sending. It is no guarantee that the message is uninfected. We advise all recipients of our messages that they should have the latest Anti-virus software installed.
> NCADC cannot accept liability for any damage your system sustains due to software viruses.
>

> ========================
> National Coalition of Anti-Deportation Campaigns (NCADC)
> 110 Hamstead Road
> Birmingham
> B20 2QS
> ========================
>

--


====
'Smoking has been found to be a leading cause of statistics'

http://incurable-hippie.blogspot.com
http://www.flickr.com/photos/hippie/

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Technorati tags: self-harm; suicide; incurable_hippie; self-injury; asylum seekers; asylum rights; NCADC; mental health; mental illness.

Sheffield Women: Avoid This Man!

Z and I were enjoying a pub lunch this afternoon when I began to be stared at and leered at by a random male stranger. He was mouthing words to me, and stared constantly at me. This made me feel upset and intimidated, but I tried to continue as if nothing was happening, and I avoided catching his gaze as far as I could.

But no amount of ignoring seemed to discourage him and I began to get angry. Why should *I* feel upset and uncomfortable, when it's *him* being rude, arrogant, intimidating and a complete idiot.

How dare he?!

I started plotting and, inspired by sites like the fantastic Holla Back NYC - If you can't slap 'em, Snap 'em I got out my phone and took a photo of him with it. (The guy in question is the one sitting down, I've pixellated the entirely innocent guy walking behind him).

He realised what I was doing and looked duly horrified, and from then until we left the pub, he didn't even glance at me. I hope I scared him, like he had scared me.

And the photo is above. It's unfortunately not a very clear one, but still worth sharing, methinks. It makes me feel better anyway. Ha, you bastard.

Now, things to say to him:
How DARE you make me feel self-conscious? How DARE you make me feel like I should put a jumper on to cover up my barely-visible-anyway cleavage? How DARE you make me feel embarrassed? How DARE you scrutinise my movements and mouth sexual suggestions to me? How DARE you treat ANY WOMAN like a piece of meat? Whatever the fuck was going on in your head was YOUR problem and you made me feel like it was MY problem and MY fault.

You're a total idiot misogynist bastard and I actually hate you.

Don't do it again. I mean that.

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Technorati tags: holla back; women's rights; incurable_hippie; revenge; feminism; anti-sexism; Sheffield; women in Sheffield.

International Women's Day

Happy day, grrls.

And in the spirit of vengeing the copper in this news story in my good city, here's another great image.

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Technorati tags: IWD; International Women's Day; incurable_hippie; feminism; police brutality; misogyny; violence against women; feminist art.

Self-Portrait Challenge

texturised mini me
Originally uploaded by incurable_hippie.

Using the very clever textorizer tool, I created this self-portrait of me long ago.

Cool tools they suggest:


• Queeky - drawing tool.
  
  
• offtype - drawing tool
  
  
• artpad - painting tool
  
  
• scribbler
  
  
• flashface - make a face using many variables
  
  
• typedrawing - draw an image with letters
  
  
• websketch
  
  
• Mr Picasso Head - fun make a face tool
  
  
• textorizer - turn your photo into a text image
  
  
• face transformer
  
  
• polaroid-o-nizer - turn your photos into polaroids
  
  
• typorganism - turn your photo into type
  
  
• pikipimp - change your photos
  
  
• movie poster - flickr tools
  
  
• hockney-izer - flickr tools
  
  
• million masterpiece - image community.
  

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Technorati tags: self-portrait; self-portrait challenge; incurable_hippie; textorizer.

Cars, Crap Arrests, Charges, Crossing Books and Cashback!

People in the UK would have struggled to miss the news stories about the petition against increasing the costs of driving here. Even people who are supposed to know me quite well were forwarding me the link to sign. As if!

So, I was joyous to receive a link to a road pricing counter-petition, from FoE via Yorkshire CND...

*Subject:* Counter petition in favour of road pricing
>
>Dear All,
>
>Friends of the Earth have created a counter petition which says:
>
>We the undersigned petition the Prime Minister to Don't Scrap the
>planned vehicle tracking and road pricing policy. *More details*
>http://petitions.pm.gov.uk/TRACK-CARS/?signed=a395b2a.ff1944#detail#detail
>
>Submitted by Tim Lewis – **Deadline to sign up by: **11 March 2007 –
>**Signatures:** 4,686
>
>Please sign up – link below. Please forward to friends
>
>Denise, T2000
>
>------------------------------------------------------------------------
>
>Dear Friends of the Earth
>
>I'm emailing you about the road pricing controversy that's in the news.
>There is a great deal of coverage of the million-signature petition
>against road pricing.
>
>The impression given is that the motorists lobby is an overwhelmingly
>powerful and vocal political force. I believe that the green lobby could
>be equally influential, but needs to make its voice heard more clearly
>in order to have a greater influence on political decision making. I
>also think that road pricing is an important step to reducing traffic
>congestion and carbon emissions, and to making the roads safer for cyclists
>
>I'd be very grateful if you could forward this link the the pro-road
>pricing petition to your members, or others who you think might be
>interested, or highlight the link on your website
>
>http://petitions.pm.gov.uk/TRACK-CARS/
>
>Let's see if we can show that there are a million people in this country
>that care about the effect that traffic congestion has on our
>environment. I'd hate to be shouted down by the motorists lobby again
>
>Thanks a lot
>
>Alice Brockington

The text of the petition is as follows,

Having recently received an email asking me to sign the a petition to scrap the vehicle tracking policy, I'd like to propose the opposite. I strongly feel that driving is a privilege and not a right. There are simply too many cars on the road and too many people making journeys by car when they could simply walk or cycle. Thousands die every year in road accidents and many, like myself, are forced to risk our lives in trying to get to work in a sustainable manner. We are dependent of foreign oil and the wars to secure such resources will only get worse if we don't curb our driving habits. Driving started off as a freedom but as we've redesigned our land around the auto mobile, rather than the pedestrian, it's become nearly a necessity. It is, however, perfectly possible to live a successful, car-free life. I would like to advocate that this become the norm and if this law helps driving to become even less attractive than it already is, I'm all for it.

I couldn't agree more! And, I'm sure, neither could you. So GO SIGN, dammit!

Oh, and speaking of car pollution, does anyone else wonder whether all that contaminated petrol killing off cars in the South East could be the result of some kind of anti-car action somewhere along the line??

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Just in from Schnews,

CRAP ARREST OF THE WEEK

...for telling it like it is.

The keepin-it-real young hoodie who made a 'firing gun' gesture at David Cameron last week has ended up the one targeted.

Cuddly 'Eton Messy' Cameron had been on walkabout on a Manchester estate when the 17-year-old made the hand gesture as he walked past. Police swiftly arrested him, then raided his house and held him over the weekend for a few joints worth of weed. Well, no-one disses the Tory Krew!

District Judge Wendy Lloyd told the youngster she was "concerned" that he'd been kept in custody so long for such a small quantity of cannabis. She said: "That you have been dealt with differently causes me great concern." This concern didn't stop her from dishing out a £75 fine however...

The youth, who cannot be named for legal reasons, is now auditioning for the lead role in a local theatre production of "Taxi Driver". (my emphasis).

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At some point last night when I couldn't sleep, I heard on the news that an Australian man in Guantanemo Bay has actually been charged now, having been there for five years. Five years! To charge him!!

But the fucked up thing is that being charged could be a positive for him? I mean, rather than rotting in the Cuban cages indefinitely, he has the prospect of *something* happening. So many people there have not had any charges against them, indeed if it took 5 years for this guy, and we know that anyone there being charged is pretty rare, the vast majority are just being held and held and held, illegally and totally cruelly. The racist and anti-Muslim focus of these detentions cannot be overlooked either. They are vital to keeping the whole 'war on terror' cog turning. Can you imagine if we didn't live in a racist society? Our governments wouldn't get away with a percentage of what they do.

One more reason to challege racism, eh?

But back to this Australian guy - could being charged actually be a way forward for him? I know that's all mixed-up and churned around, but that's the nature of the Guantanemo world he's been living in, and the nature of the huge war which our governments are pushing forward. *Everything* is mixed-up and fucked-up.

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Also, have to give plugs to BookCrossing - commit random acts of literacy!!

to Greasy Palm - earn cashback for the shopping you're already doing!

and to YouGov polls, earn money for sharing your opinions! And get excited when polls you took part in are discussed in the news ;)

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Technorati tags: anti-car; crap arrest; incurable_hippie; petitions; links; Guantanemo Bay; anti-war; anti-racism.

Visit from Auntie Flo.

So, it's that time of the month.

You may wonder why I'm posting about that, but it's because it's such a helluva thing to hit my body. It's so significant in my ability to move around, walk, go to places and do things, that it merits an entry, even if it does make someone squeamish.

And if it does make someone squeamish, it'll probably be a bloke and he really should learn to deal with it.

So, my period started this morning. Since then, I have taken plenty of kapake and anti-inflammatories, and been hooked up to a tens machine all day.

I have lost my balance numerous times and properly fallen over three times.

I have cried numerous times and writhed around in pain for longer than anyone should.

I have been in significant pain all day, and felt exhausted, ill, sick, dizzy and drained.

I get some joy from the prettiness and comfort of my washable san pro, which are infinitely preferable to even the most non-chlorine bleached and organic papery things.

I have been unable to stand or walk for several hours of the day.

I know that this is how it is for at least another 2 days, possibly more.

A lot of this is because I have endometriosis. That's a chronic, incurable and immensely painful disease. It bloody wrecks my life several days a cycle.

(Because I also have PCOS, the length of that cycle can be quite variable!)

I track my cycles on cyclespage.com, which helps me keep an eye on what is happening - whether my cycle is getting longer, or shorter, or disappearing altogether. It has been somewhat better in the last year or so than it ever has been in my life, as it has kind of, in the loosest sense, following a monthly-ish pattern. Ish.

I never even had that when I used to take the pill!

I want to love my men/gynstruation.

I want to embrace this beautiful symbol of womanhood and growth and nature and the moon. (Using beautiful, handmade reusable sanitary towels actually does help with this a lot. It's amazing to use such sensitive, gentle fabric in this way, and 'dealing with' the towels is a very grounding way of keeping in touch with my body. Not to mention the good it can do for your houseplants ;)).

I want to love, embrace and celebrate it.

But it really, really, really hurts.

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Technorati tags: periods; women; incurable_hippie; menstruation; gynstruation; embrace the moon; endometriosis; pain.

Academy Awards.

I wish they'd shut up on the news about tonight's Oscars.

I've heard so much about them I'm starting to actually care :-S

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Technorati tags: oscars; incurable_hippie.

In Bits. That's the post (and me).

So, it's been a while. It's been an awful time in my real life and struggle has been the defining word of the last few weeks. I've wanted to post here but have been in that particular state of mind where nothing I could ever say was worth the effort, and certainly I shouldn't imagine that others would want to read it.

I'm here, mainly referencing others' stuff, of which there are some really amazing sights and sites.

I'm trying to be well. I'm trying to feel ok. I'm trying to 'get it together'. I'm trying. And if you say 'yes, very trying' I will probably cry.

Anyway, on to the more interesting bits of this post...

Excitement of the week ---> hippie blog indirectly linked to from Time Magazine - you can read the article in question here: A Time Limit on Rape.

Take action!

• Power to the Patients, see also Patient Opinion

Freebies:

• Don't know how long it will be up there, but for now you can download 10 mp3s of mandarin lessons. Cool!


• Free Antique Clipart

Big 'YOU TOTALLY MISSED THE BLOODY POINT' of the Week:

• Hoohaa in US over Monologues play:
  

  Stage play The Vagina Monologues has been renamed at a theatre in Florida after a complaint about the title.
  
  It will be known as The Hoohaa Monologues - a child slang word for the female organ - after a woman in Atlantic Beach complained.
  
  Bryce Pfanenstiel from The Atlantic Theatre told local TV station Channel 4 the woman said she was "offended" when her niece asked her what a vagina was.
  
  The TV network claim the play's director is not happy about the change.
  
  Banned
  
  The Vagina Monologues is being staged by a group of law school students who plan to donate all the proceeds to charity.
  
  Eve Ensler wrote the first draft of the play in 1996 after interviewing 200 women about their views on sex, relationships, and violence against females.
  
  Each monologue somehow relates to the vagina, through themes including sex, rape, birth and mutilation.
  
  In 2004 the production was banned from the southern Indian city of Madras, as police there thought some of the script was "objectionable".
  
  After premiering in the basement of the Cornelia Street Cafe in New York, its popularity has steadily increased.
  
  It is now performed all over the world with a vast line-up of celebrity participants, such as Sharon Osborne, Trudie Styler, Kate Winslet and Jerry Hall. (read more...)

  .

Blog Posts to read:

• Word of the Day from sinister girl.
  

  ad feminam
  
  Main Entry: ad fe·mi·nam
  Pronunciation: (')ad-'fe-m&-n&m, -"äm
  Function: adjective
  Etymology: New Latin, literally, to the woman
  : marked by or being an attack on a woman's character rather than an answer to the contentions made -- compare : AD HOMINEM (read more...



• Goodbye post from a mad Sheila :(


• Carnival Against Sexual Violence 17, including a link to my How to *Really* Prevent Rape post.

Newly spotted blogs:

• Fate is Chance. Destiny is Choice


• The other world of the Dynamite Lady


• *International Charm Exchange* (beauty-licious!)


• Feminist Nation


• The Tarot Deck Creation Collective


• The Independent Artists Group (IAG) Blog

Newly spotted websites:

• Enough! - End the Israeli Occupation - Justice for the Palestinians

Other hippie blog updates:

• I unfortunately had to remove one of my flickr badges which was in the right sidebar. Something about it has been stalling the rest of the page from loading. I don't know why, and it hasn't been consistent, but for now I've taken it away. You can see my photos anyway though :)


• Ditto ZoomClouds.

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Technorati tags: links; feminism; incurable_hippie; collaborative art.

Guardian Toon...

by Steve Bell at the Guardian.

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Technorati tags: guardian; cartoon; incurable_hippie; UK Politics.

How to *really* prevent rape.

A while ago, those of us sick of being sent emails about how to not be raped (no ponytails, girls!), posted and emailed a lot about those awful 'rape prevention advice' emails which go round. My response at the time is here.

I was very glad to be sent a link to the following article today. We need more of this stuff.

One violent crime and the female victim by Emily Maguire.

If you're a woman, chances are you've received at least one version of the "how to not get raped" email. Even if you haven't, you will be familiar with the contents, because it's the same stuff you read in the newspaper whenever there's a known sex-attacker on the loose. It's the same stuff the women's magazines publish under headings like "How to stay safe".

Again and again, women are told that we can avoid rape if we don't go out alone, don't get drunk, carry our car keys as a weapon, take self-defence classes, don't dress revealingly, don't talk to strangers, and on and on. We get it. We live it. And we still get raped.

Women get raped sober and drunk. They get raped when they're out and when they're home. They get raped wearing short skirts and wearing burqas. They get raped by men they know and by men they don't know. If one woman avoids rape by using her self-defence skills, a woman unable to defend herself gets raped instead. Whatever women do or don't do, men continue to rape them.

Here's a radical suggestion: direct the rape prevention message to men. Write emails and advice columns that say: don't rape. Don't rape drunk women, solitary women, sleeping women, flirtatious women, any women. Seriously, just don't.

Men who rape may be in the minority, but that's no reason not to direct the message to all men. Not a single woman has caused her own rape, not ever, and yet women are bombarded with advice that can do nothing except cause our would-be rapist to find a different victim.

Rape is a male crime. There are female rapists but they are so rare as to be statistically insignificant. Acknowledging this in no way minimises the suffering of their victims, nor does it excuse the perpetrators. It does, however, stop us from pretending that rape is a gender-neutral crime and thus allows us to confront those responsible for most rapes.

There is a culture of acceptance about the rape of women. This becomes clear when we think about the way male-to-male rape is perceived. Male-to-male rape is seen, rightly, as a horrific, unprovoked crime. The victims are never blamed for putting themselves in harm's way by getting drunk or walking down a street alone. Men are not lectured on how to behave so as not to attract rapists.

Consider why rape is thought to be more serious if the victim is a straight man or a female virgin. The thinking is clearly that a person who has sex with men willingly in other circumstances shouldn't be so upset at "having sex", albeit unwillingly, in another circumstance. The huge misconception here is that rape is just a rougher form of sex. It isn't. Rape is to sex what being beaten unconscious is to peacefully falling asleep. It is an act of violence visited upon a person's body and it is as traumatic for a sexually active woman as it is for a virginal one or a man.

This same misconception about rape-as-sex is evident in discussions over consent. Rape, by definition, cannot be committed with the victim's consent, yet this question comes up again and again. When a woman is raped she must prove she has not consented. What did she do to stop her attacker? Did she fight hard enough, say no often enough, scream loud enough? Wasn't she dressed like she wanted to be violently penetrated? Didn't her drunkenness indicate she was up for anything? The answers to these questions are often used in lieu of evidence to determine that an alleged rape was just a big misunderstanding. If only the woman had been clearer about not wanting to be raped…

Am I arguing that women shouldn't be held responsible for their behaviour? No. If a woman drinks to excess then falls over in the street, loses her wallet and vomits all over herself, she has only herself to blame. But rape is not a consequence of getting drunk. It's a consequence of a man deciding to rape someone.

Likewise, if a woman commits a crime while drunk - driving a car or assaulting someone, say - she should be held responsible. But being raped is not a crime; raping someone is. In no other situation do we hear the victim being told to take responsibility for the criminal's actions.

Telling women they're responsible for rape doesn't keep them safe; it just keeps them scared. It also lets rapists know they can get away with their crime as long as they pick the right victim - one who "makes herself vulnerable" by refusing to live according to the edicts of a rape-tolerant society.

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Technorati tags: rape prevention; women; incurable_hippie; anti-rape; feminism; men.

To Shave or Not To Shave.

Shazia Mirza, a comedian who has long made me giggle, was on Woman's Hour yesterday, talking about her decision to stop removing her body hair. You can listen to the interview here for a few more days at least.

She is not doing this for overtly feminist reasons, she is tired of all the time it takes to maintain unnaturally hair-free legs, underarms, and anywhere else. Not to mention the money - the amount she said she had previously spent on all this was quite obscene!

One of the weirdest arguments against women having body hair is that it is 'not natural' and 'not feminine'. Well, it *is* natural - it's the shaving and waxing and bleaching and dissolving that adds the somewhat unnatural element to things. Similarly as to whether it's 'feminine' or not (whatever that means anyway), if feminine means how women are supposed to be, then, well, read the previous sentence again.

I stopped shaving various bodily areas some years ago. Partly for 'raar' feminist reasons, partly because it seemed an awful lot of effort, partly because having so many razors around me wasn't so wise at that time, and partly because I just wanted to. I had always thought that not shaving underarm hairs was 'unhygienic' which is, of course, bollocks. I haven't shaved for years now, I can't remember the last time I did. I don't feel masculine, nor have I ever done. I feel like I am living in my body as it is supposed to be (at least in terms of having hair, it's hardly a conventional body by any stretch of the imagination...!).

Richard Madeley apparently said that body hair on women makes him feel sick. Well, we know already that RM is an annoying idiot, and anything which might encourage him to go away or shut up, I fully encourage.

I have no need at all to get rid of these leg hairs. They don't worry me. I like to think I'd be as determined if I was a skirt type-of-person, but as I virtually always wear trousers it's not even much of a political statement. How can it be, if noone sees?! But I don't have to do things just to make a feminist statement (I'm growing up, see?!), I can do them because they feel right, they fit in with the rest of my life, philosophy, and body.

I enjoy my Lush baths, and I'm glad that I don't have to waste part of the totally luxurious experience with a razor in hand and, if I remember rightly, always missing some kind of thin streak of hairs up the back of my calves anyway. I don't have to rinse away chopped off hairs. I don't have to have grim accidents with old razors, and I don't have to be subjected to sharp objects every time I go into my bathroom!

I also just have no desire to make any parts of my body look pre-pubescent, yanno? I've been there, done that, when I actually was pre-pubescent. I was so glad when puberty was finally over that there's no way I want to mimic that time again ever. And if I had a partner who desired me to look that way I would be very concerned indeed. So, you want me to look like I'm 9 years old? Fuck off then. Freak.

I'd be very happy if more and more women stopped shaving various parts of their bodies. I've certainly no intention of doing otherwise.

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Technorati tags: feminism; body hair; incurable_hippie; shaving.

Things You Need to See.

From my email:

* Petition to allow people on psychiatric wards to smoke.

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* 17th May - International Day Against Homophobia

International Day Against Homophobia

MAKE MAY 17 2007 A DAY TO REMEMBER.

UK campaigners are gearing up for the 3rd International Day Against
Homophobia on May 17th. Last year there were over 40 events in the UK
to mark the day in 1990 when the World Health Organisation removed
“homosexuality” from its list of mental disorders. Internationally, 50
countries are now involved in the campaign for LGBT rights to be
recognised as human rights across the globe. IDAHO organisers are
asking all those who support the campaign to organise events on and
around May 17th.

One of the themes of this year’s campaign is “No to homophobia-yes to
education”. Students at the University of the Arts in London will be
designing two sets of posters that focus on challenging homophobia,
and celebrating LGBT people, both contemporary and figures from
history. The four winning posters will be displayed at a major event
in Central London on IDAHO day. While in Manchester several key
organisations have come together to support a campaign called
“Exceeding Expectations” a three year initiative which will reach more
than 12,000 education professionals and provide resources training and
advice in combating homophobia-information about IDAHO and
international homophobia will be a central feature of this campaign.

IDAHO’s main focus internationally will be its campaign for a United
Nations Resolution to decriminalise homosexuality. This campaign has
received massive support around the world and the petition on
www.idahomophobia.org has now been signed by over 5,000 people. Ben
Crouch, UK North West Coordinator said “The positive effect that a
resolution of this type being approved at the United Nations will have
on the global LGBT community will be equivalent in gay rights terms to
the discovery of creating electricity. For all those who have faced
persecution in the world, for all those who have faced death, torture
and imprisonment because of their sexuality, this resolution is for
them”.

Alongside this vital campaign, there will be many opportunities for
individuals and organisations to challenge homophobia. The IDAHO UK
website on www.idaho.org.uk has been designed to share information,
provide a forum to promote events and activities, share ideas and
access resources. Suggestions for involvement are organised around 4
strategic themes of “Being Seen, Being Heard, Being Well and Human
Being”.

Following a highly successful event in Sheffield last May, organised
by the Centre for HIV and Sexual Health in partnership with the SHOUT
centre, IDAHO organisers are encouraging major cities and towns in the
UK to take on the challenge of organising a minutes noise against
homophobia. Many LGBT people throughout the world have to suffer
intolerance in silence, and this minutes noise provides those of us
who have the freedom of speech without reprisal to SHOUT out on their
behalf. IDAHO UK is also encouraging people to lobby their local
councils to fly the rainbow flag on IDAHO Day, as many did last year.
Councils can also pass resolutions supporting IDAHO as Brighton did in
2006.

Derek Lennard, IDAHO-UK Coordinator said “This is a chance for us to
demonstrate that we are not smug about advances made against
homophobia in the UK, and at the same time we can not stand idly by
while LGBT people are persecuted, criminalised and slaughtered around
the world. IDAHO is a network with no bureaucracy to speak of, created
by activists. So our question to all those interested in equality is
stark and clear. As we state on our poster ”International Day Against
Homophobia, 17th May 2007-“What are *you* going to do?”.

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From BBC Ouch!:

*

Save money, seek out disability concessions
So as a disabled person, do you know about all the concessions you get? Are you too embarrassed to ask for them? Let Ouch come to your rescue with our list of the top ten disability concession tips - from half-price angling licences to free directory enquiries, talking phones to toll exemptions on bridges and tunnels, and more!
http://www.bbc.co.uk/ouch/closeup/freestuff.shtml

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*

There's a new campaign just starting up, which aims to collect 1,000,000 EU citizens' signatures to combat discrimination in all aspects of the lives of disabled people in Europe. And it's called One million for Disability.

Why 1 million - apart from it being a nice, big, round figure, of course? Well, in the draft European Union Constitutional Treaty, it's stated that the EU must respond to the call of at least 1 million citizens.

The campaign started yesterday and runs until 3 October 2007. The day after, the signatures will be officially handed over to the European Commission and Parliament.

Sign Up Here

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From The Guardian

Love in the time of phone porn.

Boys and girls see sexualised images of females at every turn. Issues such as body image, eating disorders, self-harm, depression, teen pregnancy and pressure to have sex trouble many girls, and the signs are that both sexes are struggling to make sense of what it means to be female.

Last week, a 16-year-old boy admitted making indecent images of a child after using his mobile to film his friend having sex with a 14-year-old girl and sending it to five of her classmates. In May last year, two 16-year-old schoolboys were arrested for making a porn video of a 14-year-old girl on a mobile phone and circulating it around their school in Perth, Scotland. In August, it was reported that the headteacher of Helston school in Cornwall had asked bebo.com, a website popular with teenagers, to remove the school's entry after complaints that children as young as 13 had put soft porn pictures of themselves on it. The pupils had set up the school entry.

Children who have grown up with the internet, email and mobiles are exposed to porn at a much earlier age. Both girls and boys are under immense pressure to pass it off as harmless fun. And if you don't like it, you don't like sex. Or you're gay.

"Both my daughters were subjected to porn as soon as they went to secondary school, aged 11," says Helen Browne, a mother to two teenage girls. "They had to toughen up to it pretty quickly so as not to seem prudish."

It seems that children are not learning enough about positive body image, respectful relationships and how gender roles are stereotyped. Among the criticisms levelled at sex education comes a new claim: that young people need a sex and relationships education (SRE) that counters the damaging messages of porn.

[...]

Kate, a 15-year-old who goes to school in Shropshire, says: "Practically all lads look at Zoo or Nuts and that lot. The ones who are 14 and 15, I mean. I'm not sure whether boys younger than 14 read them - they probably do. It's a very normal thing and no one thinks anything of it." Kate says she hasn't come across porn by accident "apart from on lads' phones. And too many of them have Jordan as their background."

Pressure group Object is campaigning to have lads' mags regulated in the same way as recognised porn. FHM has a "puppies cam" feature that encourages readers to take pictures of unsuspecting women's breasts. Object asks why magazines read by teenage boys aren't subject to the same regulations as those for teenage girls.

[...]

Last year, an NSPCC survey found that incomplete sex education in schools is leaving children confused about what is illegal or unacceptable, with 93% saying that their sex education lessons did not include any information about sexual abuse. The charity has called on the government to ensure 14- to 16-year-olds are taught about sex in the context of relationships, peer pressure and the law.

[...]

Those working in gender violence prevention would like to see this kind of sex education begin much sooner. Damian Carnell is a development worker at TRI (Training, Resources and Information), at the Nottinghamshire Domestic Violence Forum. "We're at a very dangerous point, with porn in all its guises being more socially accepted, sneaking into all kinds of consumer products and on to TV," he says.

"We'd like to see domestic violence awareness and positive relationship promotion, including gender respect and awareness projects, in all school year groups from year 5."

The charity Womankind Worldwide is piloting an education programme - Challenging Violence, Changing Lives - in schools across the UK, to raise awareness about male violence against women. It has a component on pornography and prostitution in year 11. Lis Martin, the creative director, says: "What teachers are saying is that younger girls are vulnerable to approaches from older, sophisticated men from outside school. Porn is used in chatroom grooming. Yet girls are also visiting porn sites to find out what they need to do to please boys. They aren't questioning abusive relationships." Read the whole article here.

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* Not a service like any other by Julie Bindel

It is a year to the day since the publication of Paying the Price, the Home Office review into prostitution - but women selling sex, and the organisations providing support for them, are still waiting for action from the government. One of the recommendations that came out of the review was the setting up of projects dedicated to assisting women out of the sex trade. Another was to tackle the demand - the punters, who keep prostitution alive. While nothing was being done, five women working in street prostitution were murdered in Ipswich.

Supporters of legalisation argue that women would be safer working in saunas and massage parlours. They also want tolerance zones, where women could work without fear of arrest. This would mean, they say, that the women would take fewer risks. But there isn't a scrap of credible evidence that women would be safer if we made the state a pimp, which is what legalisation would mean.

The former adviser to the Home Office, Katharine Raymond, recently alleged that plans to legalise prostitution were suppressed because of a fear within the department that the rightwing press would leap on it. Not so. I also worked alongside the review team, and got the firm impression that proposals to legalise were shunned because of emerging evidence from countries such as the Netherlands, Germany and Australia that legalisation has been a disaster.

In these countries, legalisation of brothels and toleration of street prostitution have resulted in an increase in trafficking, no reduction in violence towards the women, an increase in demand and an increase in illegal brothels; it has not broken the links between organised crime and the sex industry. It has normalised prostitution in the minds of the citizens, so that children are growing up seeing it as just another service industry.

Of course the women, and men, involved in prostitution should not be regarded as criminals. They are the victims of pimps, punters and the brutality involved in selling sex. But we should not just leave it at that. Let us do as the Swedes have done, and criminalise the buying of sexual services. Not only have they decriminalised the selling of sex: the Swedish government has made significant resources available to help women leave prostitution. Beside this radical legislation is a public education campaign to debunk the myths and lies about prostitution - for example that it is a career choice, and an equal exchange between buyer and seller.

Drugs workers in Ipswich say that many of the women working the streets have "pimps and boyfriends" who put them under pressure to sell sex. Legalising brothels or "tolerating" street prostitution effectively legalises pimping. Supporters of such measures often cite the fact that there has not been one woman murdered in a tolerance zone, either here or abroad. But if a man wishes to harm a street worker, he will simply drive her away from the area.

In 1999, I was involved in setting up the first UK re-education programme for kerb crawlers, in Leeds. In partnership with West Yorkshire police, we piloted a scheme with the intention that police would shift their focus from the women to the men who create the demand. The police offered the men they stopped a choice - either go to court and get your name in the paper, or attend a one-day course on the realities of prostitution.

Did the men who attended the course change their minds? I doubt it. However, if men grow up being given a clear message that prostitution is the abuse of women, and a warning that they will be in court if they pay for sex, we may go some way towards eradicating demand for sexual services. That coupled with helping women to leave the industry, might see an end to prostitution, and the murder of women caught up in it. Imagine that.

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From the blogosphere:

* Action against sex shops from CharlieGrrl.

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* Woman Prosecuted for Attempting to Induce an Abortion. This is terrifying - the full story is here, but Feministe's analysis is definitely worth reading. Also covered here at Women's Space and here by Sparkle*Matrix.

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* As if Literally, A Weblog (a blog dedicated to the wrongful use of the word literally) wasn't good enough, there is now also lowercase L, dedicated to the annoying habit of some net users and sign writers to CAPITAlISE everything except the lETTER l.

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* UK Law and Rape - in the name of football and follow-up, both from Sparkle*Matrix.

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* FINALLY, I have been tagged with a meme to reveal five things about myself, so here goes.
- Z and I had our third anniversary last Wednesday. This made me very happy.
- I recently sold a broken mp3 player on ebay for nearly £25. I was very glad I hadn't just chucked it!
- I am going to be 30 this year. I am not a big one for being bothered about age, but this is ever-so-slightly freaking me out.
- I cried in town yesterday when I unexpectedly came across a funeral. It was quite embarrassing but I couldn't stop. I then had to hide in the Church the funeral had just come out of until I calmed down enough to carry on with whatever I was doing.
- I love watching birds eating from my bird feeder.

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Technorati tags: meme; list; incurable_hippie; links; feminism; women; disability; petition; anti-homophobia; psychiatry; smoking; smokers' rights; IDAHO; anti-porn; rape; prostitution; abortion rights.

Movement Photography Assignment.

Passing Traffic


Zooming to Hospital


Ghostly People


Morris Dancers


Fire Spinning


Seagull Takes Flight

The six photos I submitted for my Motion Photography college assignment.

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Technorati tags: photography; motion photography; incurable_hippie; movement.

Gabcast! incurable hippie's musings and rants #3

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Technorati tags: audio; audio blogging; incurable_hippie; rambling.

Blog For Choice Day.

Today is Blog for Choice Day, as organised by Bush v. Choice annually. This year they want bloggers to post on this day, telling readers why we are pro-choice.

I wasn't always. A very Catholic upbringing and much emotional blackmail sucked me into the belief that abortion was very, very wrong. It was so drilled into my head that abortion kills babies that how could I *not* be against it? Who wouldn't oppose killing babies?!

In school they showed us a film where we saw abortions taking place, we saw the 'products of conception' (in Catholic-ese, the unborn baby) in bin liners, and we were told and showed the full goryness of terminations.

Strangely though, watching that awful film was where I first began to question my 'pro-life' beliefs. I wondered why the filmmakers had to show us those things, to prove their point. Was argument and discussion not enough? Sure, there was blood and gore, but opposing abortion on the basis of it being gory and making you feel a bit squeamish would make you fundamentally opposed to tonsillectomies, open heart surgery, appendix operations, and any and every other surgical procedure which exists.

I thought, surely they should want people to oppose abortion because it's wrong, not because it might make you feel a bit sick...

I also, at this stage, was beginning to for the first time in my life, have good friends who were not Roman Catholic. I remember watching a news report about (the then new) IVF, and commenting 'that's really bad'. The friend I was with said, 'No, you must be mixing it up with something else, it's really good, it helps people have children when they couldn't otherwise'.

I was confused! They'd said at Church how bad it was, the Catholic Pictorial (yep, that's the name!) had front page headlines about how evil it was. But if K was right, that it helped create babies, then why was I supposed to be against it?

The big thing was that I had only ever heard 'pro-life' arguments. (I put 'pro-life' in quotation marks because I now believe that being anti-choice and being pro-life are quite different things. However, at that point in my life, I did believe I was pro-life, and so use that term here). I had heard that there were pro-abortion arguments, but only in the context of 'how to argue back'.

So, I had my SPUC leaflet where they rubbished pro-choice principles and points of view, and I had no reason not to believe it.

I knew all the arguments against all the arguments!
But more planned children are abused than unplanned ones!
But women virtually never get pregnant after rape!
But even if the Mum is going to die, she's had a chance of life, the baby should have the chance over her!
But even if the woman was raped, don't punish the baby for its father's crimes!
But the woman will be so traumatised after an abortion, and will never forgive herself!
But even if she doesn't want the baby, she should give it up for adoption and make a childless couple happy!
And so it went on. I believed this stuff! I didn't know any better.

Thankfully as I became an adult and left home, Catholicism's influence declined, and real women in real situations became part of my real consciousness. A woman I knew had an abortion and I was stunned that afterwards, she was predominantly relieved. This made me question everything - all I had ever been told was that women who have abortions will be depressed and grieving forever, and here was C, breathing a sigh of relief, with no doubt that she had made the right decision.

I realised that even when the anti-choicers were pretending to be on the woman's side (women shouldn't have abortion because they always regret it, and they may never have any more children / may get breast cancer / whatever bandwagon is currently being jumped on), they really, really weren't.

So if that one argument wasn't true, what about all the others??

I realised that women aren't 'murdering' their 'babies'. I realised that life just doesn't work like that. I realised that women getting pregnant needed to have absolute and total control over their own bodies, and that being pregnant when you don't want to be is terribly detrimental to a woman's health, soul, mind and life.

Things just aren't as clearcut as the anti-choice lobby like to suggest. The fact is that a woman should never, ever be forced to carry and give birth to a baby when she does not want to. The fact is that women in this society are vilified no matter what they do (have a termination, become a single mother, work, don't work...). The fact is that the men involved in unwanted pregnancies can, and so often do, happily run away and take no responsibility for their actions. Women are forced to take responsibility because this thing is inside their body, making them throw up and feel exhausted and be terrified of what on earth they are going to do, what is going to happen.

Because the consequences of unwanted pregnancies are a million times bigger for women than for men, women must be able to make a free and informed choice as to what she is going to do. No woman should be forced to carry and give birth to a baby they do not want. No woman. Ever.

The physical and mental trauma of unwanted pregnancy on a woman is massive. And what a welcome for the kid when it is born!

If a woman knows she does not have the stability / finances / good health / desire / whatever to give birth to, or to bring up a baby, we need to respect her wishes on that. She knows best! It is her body, after all. It is her life, after all.

Because the thing is, a woman having an abortion is not killing her baby. And nor is the doctor who carries it out. Nor the nurse who assists. Nor the friend who takes the woman to the hospital. Nobody is killing anything or anyone.

There are cells inside the woman's womb which, given the right conditions may have developed into a baby. But at 8 weeks, 12 weeks, 16 weeks, whatever date, it is not actually a baby. It lives off the woman's body and nutrients, and without her it would not exist or live. Even the later abortions, which certain politicians are determined to ban, on the basis that a tiny proportion of babies born at 24 weeks can live, are not evil because of that fact. Most births of wanted children at 24 weeks are unfortunately doomed, and in any case, abortions up to 24 weeks are very rare, and should not be affected by those rare statistics. Just because one baby born at 24 weeks may survive, it does not mean that a woman pregnant with a foetus of that same duration should be forced to endure the remaining 16 weeks of pregnancy, and birth.

Many of the women who need such late abortions are in a very vulnerable position. Often it is younger women who may not have known they were pregnant, or who may have been in some degree of denial about their pregnancies. Or women who discover that they are at risk of a severely ill baby and know they could not cope with that, or do not want to put a baby born naturally through the pain which could occur.

As a disabled woman myself, I am of course wary of calls for all potentially disabled kids to be wiped out in a eugenics-type fashion, but this is not, not NOT happening! Women must have the right to choose whether they remain pregnant or not, whether they have a child or not. It must be ultimately their own decision. It has to be!

Those who are anti-choice are anti-women. There is much misogyny within the anti-choice arguments and organisations. They do not believe that women are capable of making up their own minds, or mature enough to, and certainly shouldn't be trusted with such decisions about their own bodies. More importance is given to what is (sorry SPUC, but it really is) a collection of cells inside a womb than to the woman whose womb that is.

There is a myth that here in the UK we have 'abortion on demand'. That's not true. It can be pretty bloody tricky to get a termination, and even more tricky to get one on the NHS. Many women end up having to pay for their terminations. Women are made to have ultrasound, so-called 'dating' scans, which force the image of the embryo into a woman's consciousness and seem purely there to invoke guilt and regret and a change of mind in the woman. NHS abortions are often very much pushing the 12 week limit because of delays, and indeed on the news today, the BBC reported that despite the recommended 3-week waiting time for a woman who has requested a termination, many women are having to wait 7 weeks for the procedure. Now, given that it may be some weeks before a woman realises she is pregnant, she will either be forced to pay for a private operation, forced to undergo a more traumatic later abortion, or forced to have an unwanted child.

Women must always be given the right to choose what happens to her body. It's as simple, and as complicated, as that.

I leave you with a quotation from a wise woman (don't know who, unfortunately).

How can you trust me with a baby if you can't trust me with a choice?

Good Links:
abortion clinic days
Bush v. Choice - the pro-choice anti-Bush action centre

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Technorati tags: abortion; pro-choice; incurable_hippie; feminism; Catholicism; a woman's right to choose; Blog for Choice.

Art in the Dark Park.

Last Sunday, Z and I went to an Art in the Park event in Weston Park.

After creating funky illuminated flowers we went round the new Weston Park Museum, and then I did some photography for my current assignment.

We returned to Art in the (now) Dark for what was by far the best bit of the day - a fire spinning performance. More fun photography was done, as you can see.

Lots of good learning about shutter speeds and aperture sizes ensued. Loving my camera :)

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Technorati tags: Art in the Park; Sheffield; incurable_hippie; photography; fire spinning; photos.